4人英语小品剧本

公园记（四人课堂话剧）A(衣衫褴褛） B（衣着光鲜） C小花 E椅子 F新闻记者B坐在E上吃东西，A一乞丐上前。A：先生，先生，请给我些面包，谢谢，我饿得不行了。B：（厌恶）让开，让开。（然后便起身离开，这时他的钱包掉到E上头了） A：先生，先生。（A看见后，立即拾起，追上了走远的B）B：让开，让开啊，我没吃的了，也没钱了。（看也不看A，仍自顾自地走了） C：他真愚蠢啊A：可„„先生„„您听我说„„（仍拉着B衣服的后摆）B：挖，你这人怎么这么讨厌！（还是没有回头看A一眼）C：椅子啊，你会不会觉得刚刚坐在你身上的人特愚蠢？E：唉，人总是这么愚蠢啊~~~~与此同时A与B还在纠缠，这时E终于隐忍不住爆发了。E：先生！你的钱包丢了！你怎么这么傻啊。A与B同时回头，看见了那会说话的椅子E，吓昏过去了。这一幕恰巧被经过的F看见了。于是F就报道了这一事件。F：大家好，我是新闻记者F，今天我看见了一个奇异的现象，一个椅子说话了，两个人被吓昏了，下面我将采访一下被吓昏的两个人。B：哦，上帝，哦，妈妈。F：这个人傻了，我们不鸟他了，下面我采访一下另一个人吧，请问你为什么不告诉他，他的钱包丢了？A：对不起，我不知道“钱包”这个单词怎么讲„„1/3页F：通过这一事件，我们可以认识到，掌握一门外语的重要性，以及金钱给人类带来的影响。是吗，椅子？E：是啊，是啊。（E傻傻地拼命点头）C：唉，人可真愚蠢，椅子也被他们弄傻了。A:Sir,sir,please give me a piece of bread.thank you,sir.I'm hungry to die.B:Get away,get away,dirty man.A:Sir,sir!!B:Run away,please run away.I have no food,and I don't have money,eitherC:Hey,xiao D,he is so foolish,isn't he?A:But....sir....please listen to me.....B:Wa,why are you so disgusting!!C:Hey,chair,do you feel the man sat on you a moment ago is very stupid.E:Ai,pretty flower,do you know,men are always very silly.E:Sir!you lost your wallet!Can't you be more clever?F:Good morning,everybody.I'm a jonrnist F. Today I saw a very weird thing--a chair open her mouth,and two men are frightened to faint. Now,I will intenview the two nozzy man.B:Wo,my god,wo,my,mum.F:I'm sorry to tell you this man has been mad.We needn't take notice of him.Let me interview the other man,Hello,man,can you tell men why didn't you tell him he lost his wallet?A:I'm sorry,I don't know how to speak "钱包" in english......F:Dear audience,through this thing we can learn that how improtant it is to mastery a foreign language,and how lagre the money affect us. Is that all right,chair?E:Yes,yes.C:Ai,men is so silly.

4人英语话剧剧本It's a Small World CastKobe: K; play presenterAllen: Ab (boy)Johnson: JBZ: BArthur: Ag (Girl)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Scene IK: There was a lovely village in the countryside. Allen, Johnson, Bz, and Arthur are good friends. Here, they are creating the most beautiful memories.B: Hey! Look! A shooting star!Ag: Where?B: Here! (Take out a big special ring!)Ag: So, what is this for?B: Will you marry me?Ab: Sure, honey!(Ag takes out a hammer and hits Ab.)Ab: Ouch! OK! I'll be quiet.J: Hey, guys! What are you talking about?Ab: They are talking about their future. (Point at Ag and B.)J: Their future?Ag: No! Our futures. I'm gonna be a worldwide famous writer.Ab: I'm gonna be the greatest singer. And I'm worried that there will be too many girls hanging around and crazy for me!(J, B, Ag pretend to be disgusted.)J: As far as I am concerned, becoming the most successful businessman is my life goal.Ag: What about you, BZ?Ab: To marry her, right? (Ab hits B gently.)Ag: Come on! Be serious. Let him tell us.B: I want to stay here and be a farmer.Ag: All right! We're only ten now. Who knows what will actually happen in the next ten or twenty years?J: Whatever our dreams are, no matter where we are, twenty years from now, we'll all come here having a reunion.Ab: And don't forget, we are…K: Wait for me!...All: Friends forever!--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Scene II转自： http://www.coffbar.comK: Twenty years later, at Johnson Rich's company.(Phone rings.)Secretary A: Hello! This is Rich telephone company. May I help you? OK! OK! bye-bye!Secretary B: (Knock, Knock, Knock!) Mr. Rich, may I come in?J: Come in!Secretary B: (With a flirting look) Mr. Rich, Can I invite you to dinner tonight?(Secretary A cuts in between the two of them.)Secretary A: Hey! Young lady! You may be young and beautiful, but I’ve been working here much longer than you. I really don't mind you inviting Mr. Rich to dinner, if you don’t want to work here anymore!J: Yo, ladies. Nothing but business, O.K.? Now, go back to your work!Secretary A: Sir!J: Now what?Secretary A: This is the ad for the new cell phone design, and the main idea is "It's a small world!"J: Good job! Look, my cell phones make the world smaller.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Scene III(At Arthur’s new book press conference)Reporter A: Congratulations, Arthur. We know that you are the winner of the Pulitzer Prize.Reporter B: Why did you want to write this book?Ag: Well, I always believe that touching words can comfort people. Many people in the world live a difficult life. With words, we can tell them that they're not alone wherever they are.Reporter C: Why did you name the book "It's a small world "?Ag: It’s said that “the pen is mightier than the sword.” Through words, we can express our love, thoughts, and feelings to our friends. The power of words shortens the distance among people and makes the world smaller, right?--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Scene IV转自： Allen Baker’s concert…Allen’s fans are crazy for him and screaming everywhere.)Host: Ladies and gentlemen, let's welcome our super star, Mr. Anderson!!(Fans scream like crazy.)Ab: (Singing) It can happen to anyone of us, anyone you think of. Anyone can fall. Anyone can hurt someone they love. Hearts will break. Cause I made a stupid mistake…(A fan shakes hands with Allen, and then passes out and is taken away.)Ab: Thank you! Maybe you don’t understand the language I speak. Maybe we have different blood in our bodies. But I really hope that I can deliver something to you all and make you understand what I try to express. And I really really hope the music can shorten the distance between us and make the world smaller. Thank you! I love you all !! (Two crazy fans run to Allen and hold him tight. The guards drag them away.)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Scene V(At Bz Farmer’s Big Tomato Award Ceremony…)Host: Now! I'm honored to announce the first prize winner of the super award. Let's welcome Farmer of the year, Mr. BZ !(BZ runs up to the stage with a surprised look, and his fans cheer for him.)B: My goodness! I can't believe it! Thank you, my tomato fans! (Waving to them with the trophy.) I love my hometown. I grow crops not only for the people living here, butalso for the people all over the world who are suffering from hunger and poverty. My childhood friends have all been very successful in different fields to make the world a better place to live in. Our love binds us together and makes the world smaller. I’m glad that we all made our dreams come true. Thank you! Thank you!--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Scene VIK: Twenty years later, at the Home-coming Reunion…Ab: (To J) I use your cell phone. It's great, man!J: (To Ag) And I read your book!Ag: (To Bz) And I ate your big tomatoes. They are amazingly deliciousB: (To Allen) And I listened to your music. It really takes my breath away!J: Let's have a toast to my cell phones.Ab: No! To my music.Ag: To My books.B: To my love and to our friendships.J: All these things have made the world smaller. We feel so much closer to each other now.All: Oh! What a small world!Director: Cut! Cut! You all did a great job. Let's call it a day.(Freeze the scene with them holding their belongings, microphone, cell phone, book, and big tomato.)

四人英语话剧剧本-The Rolling Orange The Rolling Orange讲述桔子的故事。一天早上，桔子一家醒来，发现人们开着卡车，搬着梯子，来摘桔子了，快来看看他们的命运如何吧。 人物 Tom: Father Orange Klye: Mother Orange Wallis: Older Sister Orange Jessie: Little Brother Orange Characters Father Orange: He is a middle-aged, considerate, and thoughtful man. Mother Orange: She is a younger and more youthful woman than Father. She is also very optimistic. Older Sister Orange: She is young , energetic, and competitive . Little Brother Orange: He is the youngest and, therefore, a little spoiled. SCENE I 场景一：果园 One Morning in an Orange Orchard. (Today is a sunny day . An orange family is discussing nervously about something on an orange tree in an orchard. ) Father: I was awakened early this morning by the sound of trucks in the field (yawning). Mother: Well, it wasn’t the first time to be like this. Sister: A whole bunch of strange men was brought in by trucks. Brother: That really scared me. They got out and started to climb up ladders. Sister: (Afraid suddenly) Oh! My friends were grabbed and put into large bags. I could hear them yell for help. Father: Hey! We shouldn’t look at them; otherwise, they’ll notice us. Mother: But it’s useless. Sister: Oh, God! We’re discovered! Brother: Oh! We’re being grabbed and pulled from our branches. What will we do for food and water? Sister: It will be so uncomfortable going to town in that bag with a lot of strangers. Mother: Well, we’ll just have to do our best. Father: Yeah! SCENE II On a Fruit Stand. (After having been on the road in a bag for half an hour, they are placed on a fruit stand. ) Sister: Gee! This place is so cold and desolate. I wish we had our friends here on this stand (looks at the opposite fruit stall). Brother: I tried to make friends with these people on our way here, but everyone looked pretty uncomfortable and scared. (Suddenly) Sister: Oh! Mother! How could they do that? Mother: What are you talking about? Brother: I know what she’s talking about (Brother turns to look). Father: What did you see? Sister: My friends were cut up and eaten. How could they do that? I’m so scared. Father: Now, children, be calm. Mother: Sh~ Someone’s coming. Father: Try to be quiet. Sister: I don’t want to be taken away. Brother: Oh! My friend’s being taken away. Sister: Your friend looks so fat. Mother: If we look sour, maybe we won’t be taken away. Brother: That’s a bright idea. But how could we look sour? Mother: Now, children, stop being scared and calm down. Father: Oh! No! I’m being looked at. Mother: I told you not to eat so much. Now you look so fat and juicy. (Father is being taken away.) Brother: Oh, no, Dad! Father: (Sadly) Good bye, children. Sister: Oh! Dad’s being put into the basket and taken away. Mother: Oh, no! Brother: Stop that. Our father can’t be taken away. Mother: Look, he’s being bagged and put into a cart. Sister: Hey! The cart’s wheels are going out of the store. Brother: A car’s pulling up. Mother: Oh, no! His bag is being picked up. Sister: But it’s breaking. And Dad’s falling out. Brother: Dad’s rolling away. All: (Jumping up and down cheering) ROLL! ROLL! He’s getting away. Sister & Brother: Yip! Yip! Hurray for Dad! Mother: Oh! Thank God.

四人英语话剧剧本-The Rolling OrangeThe Rolling Orange讲述桔子的故事。一天早上，桔子一家醒来，发现人们开着卡车，搬着梯子，来摘桔子了，快来看看他们的命运如何吧。人物Tom: Father OrangeKlye: Mother OrangeWallis: Older Sister Orange Jessie: Little Brother OrangeCharactersFather Orange: He is a middle-aged, considerate, and thoughtful man.Mother Orange: She is a younger and more youthful woman than Father. She is also very optimistic.Older Sister Orange: She is young , energetic, and competitive .Little Brother Orange: He is the youngest and, therefore, a little spoiled.SCENE I 场景一：果园One Morning in an Orange Orchard.(Today is a sunny day . An orange family is discussing nervously about something on an orange tree in an orchard. )Father: I was awakened early this morning by the sound of trucks in the field (yawning). Mother: Well, it wasn’t the first time to be like this.Sister: A whole bunch of strange men was brought in by trucks.Brother: That really scared me. They got out and started to climb up ladders.Sister: (Afraid suddenly) Oh! My friends were grabbed and put into large bags. I could hear them yell for help.Father: Hey! We shouldn’t look at them; otherwise, they’ll notice us.Mother: But it’s useless.Sister: Oh, God! We’re discovered!Brother: Oh! We’re being grabbed and pulled from our branches. What will we do for food and water?Sister: It will be so uncomfortable going to town in that bag with a lot of strangers. Mother: Well, we’ll just have to do our best. Father: Yeah!SCENE II On a Fruit Stand.(After having been on the road in a bag for half an hour, they are placed on a fruit stand. )Sister: Gee! This place is so cold and desolate. I wish we had our friends here on this stand (looks at the opposite fruit stall).Brother: I tried to make friends with these people on our way here, but everyone looked pretty uncomfortable and scared. (Suddenly)Sister: Oh! Mother! How could they do that?Mother: What are you talking about?Brother: I know what she’s talking about (Brother turns to look). Father: What did you see?Sister: My friends were cut up and eaten. How could they do that? I’m so scared. Father: Now, children, be calm. Mother: Sh~ Someone’s coming. Father: Try to be quiet.Sister: I don’t want to be taken away. Brother: Oh! My friend’s being taken away. Sister: Your friend looks so fat.Mother: If we look sour, maybe we won’t be taken away. Brother: That’s a bright idea. But how could we look sour? Mother: Now, children, stop being scared and calm down. Father: Oh! No! I’m being looked at.Mother: I told you not to eat so much. Now you look so fat and juicy. (Father is being taken away.)Brother: Oh, no, Dad!Father: (Sadly) Good bye, children.Sister: Oh! Dad’s being put into the basket and taken away. Mother: Oh, no!Brother: Stop that. Our father can’t be taken away. Mother: Look, he’s being bagged and put into a cart.Sister: Hey! The cart’s wheels are going out of the store. Brother: A car’s pulling up.Mother: Oh, no! His bag is being picked up. Sister: But it’s breaking. And Dad’s falling out. Brother: Dad’s rolling away.All: (Jumping up and down cheering) ROLL! ROLL! He’s getting away. Sister & Brother: Yip! Yip! Hurray for Dad! Mother: Oh! Thank God.

马东：全国的观众朋友们我和我的五官给您 齐：拜年啦！ 眼睛：我是马东的眼睛我祝大家眉开眼笑！ 马东：嘿，我这眼睛多喜庆！ 耳朵：我是马东的耳朵我祝您耳听八方！ 马东：大耳朵有福！ 嘴巴：我是马东的嘴我祝大家笑口常开！ 马东：我的嘴会说话。 鼻子：我是马东的鼻子我祝大家#@&……@#@！）（英语：春节快乐！） 马东：嘿，为什么到我这辈改外国鼻子了？ 鼻子：洋鼻子大呀，您喘气儿痛快！ 眼睛、耳朵、嘴：（笑）对，您喘气儿痛快！ 马东：我痛快什么呀，麻烦了！ 眼、鼻、嘴、耳：怎么了？ 马东：昨天晚上我酒后驾车，让警察逮着，驾照给扣了，怎么办？ 眼睛：我可没看见！ 耳朵：这跟我可没关系啊！ 马东：停！干嘛？又犯老毛病，谁都跑不了，一个一个说。来，谁先说？你？你！眼睛，你看的最清楚你先说。 眼睛（盯着耳朵）：我说什么呀？ 马东：酒后驾车呀！ 眼睛（依旧盯着耳朵）：诶哟，你酒后驾车啦？ 马东：我说你看着我说行吗？ 眼睛：我这不看着你呢嘛！ 马东：这是看着我的吗，我，在这儿呢。 眼睛（转向鼻子）：哦你在这儿呢，诶你好你好 马东：嘿，我这什么眼睛这是 眼睛（转向观众）：您不知道，马东这眼睛有毛病。 马东：我眼睛有什么毛病啊 眼睛：斜眼儿 马东：我斜眼儿？ 眼睛：也不老斜， 马东：什么时候斜呢？ 眼睛：一看见女的，他斜上了。 马东：我就算斜眼儿昨天你也看得见警察！ 眼睛：来的是男警察，呱唧我把眼睛闭上了，嘿嘿…… 马东：嘿他这就算躲了 鼻子：推脱呀 马东：你说什么？ 鼻子：他这简直就是推脱！ 马东：听听，听听，啊，人家这个态度，作为一个外国鼻子，不远万里来到我们脸上，这是一种什么精神，什么精神？这就是……瞪鼻子上脸的精神 鼻子：嗨…… 马东：鼻子你说说吧 鼻子：我说什么？ 马东：酒后驾车呀 鼻子：你酒后驾车了？ 马东：你在场！ 鼻子：唉呀，这可是中国人的内症啊，这不我就不参与了 马东：嘿，这时候他不参与了？ 鼻子：不是马东的鼻子有毛病大家都知道啊 马东：我这鼻子有什么毛病？ 鼻子：没窟窿眼儿 马东：你让大家伙儿看看我四个长的（此处发音是这样的，但具体什么字俺就不清楚了），我有眼儿！ 鼻子：有眼儿也没用啊，那天我一直打喷嚏啊秋！什么也不知道啊我 马东：嘿他也躲了，没关系，我问问这个，耳朵！ 耳朵(对嘴说)：昨儿那洋河大曲还不错！ 嘴：找你呢 马东：你啊，我跟你…… 耳朵：不是马东这耳朵呀 马东、耳朵：有毛病！ 马东：我知道你是这句，那你也得说说 耳朵：您说什么？ 马东：我让你说说！ 耳朵：大点儿声说什么？ 马东：我让你说说！ 耳朵：诶哟怎么干张嘴不出声儿呀 马东：我这是干张嘴吗 耳朵（对嘴说）：说什么呢 马东：谁的钱包? 耳朵：我的！ 马东：诶，这你可听见了 耳朵：不是这……您说什么？ 马东：又来了。你呀，你可别装听不见 耳朵：明天您要上法院？这大过年的干嘛去呀？ 马东：你是诚心 耳朵：你要离婚？为什么呀？ 马东：诚心俩字儿听不懂？ 耳朵：第三者是冯巩？你说冯巩这人多讨厌你这人 马东：我不信你听不清！ 耳朵：离完你要娶董卿？ 马东：你这纯属是装蒜！ 耳朵：朱军死活还不干？ 马东：这都谁跟谁啊！ 耳朵：不行娶徐静蕾啊！ 马东：怎么这么乱呢！ 耳朵：哦，岳父是毕福剑啊！ 马东：你走吧你！ 马东：嘴嘴，你也跑不了！你说说 嘴：不就酒后驾车这事吗 马东：对呀 嘴：这事儿不用再说了 马东：啊？ 嘴：再说马东这嘴有毛病大伙儿都知道 马东：你等会儿，他们仨说我有毛病我都认了，我，打听打听干什么的，我这嘴，没毛病。 嘴：是呀，你说话的时候，你这嘴肯定没毛病 马东：对不对啊？ 嘴：但是你一喝完酒 马东：怎么了？ 嘴：@#￥￥￥%&*& 马东：我什么？ 嘴：#￥……##￥%……# 马东：他说什么 耳朵：他说你说话不清楚 马东：这句你怎么听见了 马东（对嘴说）：你呀，把舌头捋直了昨天晚上怎么回事儿，好好说 嘴：#&……￥……#&…………#@￥@！￥@%@#%#%……%%！#&**~！@￥# 马东：我是这样吗，我这舌头要这样我甭喝酒警察就给我带走喽。看看你们四个，事到临头，全想躲？咱们这本子怎么能要回来呀，就你们这个态度…… 眼睛：哎脑袋 马东：诶？ 眼睛：你这态度就不对了 马东：我这态度怎么了？ 眼睛：您得好好跟警察说呀 马东：诶那我应该怎么说呢？ 眼睛：警察叔叔 马东：叫叔叔？ 眼睛：酒后驾车是我们的不对 马东：对 眼睛：但是责任，是你们的 马东：诶，责任怎么归警察呢 眼睛：我们马路上有公交专线 马东：对 眼睛：有奥运专线 马东：对呀 眼睛：为什么不设一条酒后专线？ 马东：给酒后驾车设专线？ 眼睛：便于您管理呀 马东：这怎么管理呀 眼睛：您一看晃晃悠悠开过来一辆，赶紧上前(敬礼)，您好，喝了，别慌，请走，酒后专线！ 马东：干脆酒后驾车都走一条线上去了？ 眼睛：哎不行，造成新的交通拥堵 马东：那怎么办呢？ 眼睛：分单双号 马东：这还分单双号呢 眼睛：一三五和白的走，二四六喝啤的走 马东：嘿——那混着喝的只能礼拜天走 眼睛：没错实在不行我们还能分组嘛 马东：还能分组呢 眼睛：喝二锅头的礼拜二走，喝五粮液的礼拜五走 马东：嘿，那喝金六福的只能礼拜六走 眼睛（拍马东肩膀）：分得多清楚 马东（甩开眼睛的手）：什么乱七八糟的 鼻子：行啦 马东：胡出主意！ 鼻子（走到马东跟前）：别听他的！ 马东：不能听他的 鼻子：说你见着警察你得这么说 马东：我怎么说呢？ 鼻子：警察舅舅 马东：警察舅……怎么到你这儿叫舅舅了 鼻子：我是外国生，外甥 马东：对，外甥，外甥是得叫舅舅 鼻子：酒后驾车的事情确实是我们的责任 马东：对 鼻子：但是警察是讲法律的 马东：法律 鼻子：这法律呢用英文那叫law 马东：law？ 鼻子：当然了，捞多捞少啊怎么个捞法这就看你的技术啊 马东：你以前在加拿大是打鱼的 鼻子：我说的是法律啊 马东：法律？ 鼻子：法律是讲证据滴 马东：对 鼻子：证据是讲逻辑滴 马东：对 鼻子：逻辑是讲道理滴 马东：对呀 鼻子：道理是可以讲不清楚滴 马东：对……啊，啊不对，不对啊不对 鼻子：啊道理是一定要讲清楚滴 马东：哎这句对 鼻子：对那么道理用英语怎么讲啊 马东：啊是道……哎道理我还真不会讲 鼻子：你看看你看看，连道理都不会讲—— 马东：啊！ 鼻子：那你怎么能讲清道理啊？！ 马东：嘿，我让这大鼻子给我绕进去了 耳朵：脑袋脑袋 马东：啊？ 耳朵：千万别听他的 马东：不听他的 耳朵：警察说这有用吗？ 马东：没用！ 耳朵：你应该强调咱们中国国情！ 马东：那我应该怎么强调呢？ 耳朵：你这么说呀 马东：啊！ 耳朵：说那个——警察大大 马东：警察大……你们怎么一个毛病呢 耳朵：我肯定不一样啊 马东：啊你怎么说？ 耳朵：我这么说呀！ 马东：啊！ 耳朵：警察大大听我说 您千万别生气 马东：唱的！ 耳朵：酒后驾车这事跟我一点儿没有关系 我们老板来请客 让我一块跟去 红滴 黄滴 啤滴 洋滴 还有两箱大曲 马东：酒到齐了！ 耳朵：不管远近都是客人 我不能客气 马东：对！ 耳朵：既然坐在一起—— 马东：怎么样？ 耳朵：统统喝下去—— 马东：喝上喽！ 耳朵：警察我告诉你—— 马东：嗯！ 耳朵：我酒量没问题 今天我没运气让我碰见你 警察我告诉你—— 马东：啊？ 耳朵：有梦想谁都了不起—— 马东：嚯！ 耳朵：我还敢酒后开飞机—— ：行了行了 马东：去，去，到那边飞去！太可气了！ 嘴：我必须得说两句了 马东：你得说说 嘴：冲他们三个这个态度，你那驾照要不回来 马东：彻底要不回来了 嘴：你得跟警察这么说 马东：我应该怎么说呢？ 嘴：警察老爷， 马东：警察老—— 嘴：我这个问题呢—— 马东：老爷像话吗？！同志！同志！ 嘴：警……警察同……同志！酒后驾车，肯定是我们的不对 马东：态度好 嘴：但是酒后和驾车，这是两个问题 马东：两个问题 嘴：酒后的问题就不要再说了 马东：这不……哎诶？ 嘴：再说一说我为什么要驾车 马东：为什么呢？ 嘴：我为什么要驾车呢？ 马东：啊？ 嘴：因为我要回家 马东：对 嘴：回家为什么要驾车呢？ 马东：为什么呢？ 嘴：因为家住得远 马东：对 嘴：家为什么住得远呢？ 马东：为什么呢？ 嘴：因为在郊区买的房 马东：对 嘴：为什么在郊区买的房呢？ 马东：为什么呢？ 嘴：因为城里房价太贵 马东：对 嘴：为什么房价太贵呢？ 马东：为什么呢？ 嘴：因为美国资贷危机 马东：对 嘴：为什么资贷危机呢？ 马东：为什么呢？ 嘴：因为他金融滑坡 马东：对 嘴：他金融滑坡呢…… 马东：你到底等会儿吧你等会儿，你想把我扽哪儿去啊这是？什么嘴啊你这，你就给我说说酒后驾车的事儿！ 嘴：#@！#%%*&&*+——@%#￥￥@！#￥%！%￥…… 马东：诶呀行行行行，您看见了吧？连推带躲！我跟你们说现在什么环境？问责制，出了事儿得有人负责！你们说，谁负责？ 齐声（除马东外）：脑袋！ 马东：啊是，我负领导责任你们四个也得分出谁负主要责任！ 耳、眼、鼻：嘴！ 嘴：哎？凭什么我负主要责任？ 眼睛：喝酒喝酒你不喝那酒我们能出那事儿吗？ 耳朵：就怨你！ 嘴：还怨我？ 耳朵：嗯！ 嘴：要不是你耳朵根子软最后那杯白的我能喝下去吗？ 耳朵：这是……喝是喝了，问题警察提问的时候让你吹气你那（呼——）你使那么大劲儿干嘛呀？ 鼻子：啊对呀！ 嘴：你废话要不是你那洋鼻子喘那么多气儿我拿什么往外吹呀我！ 眼睛：嗯！ 鼻子：那你眼睛你要是早看见那个警察我不就绕过去了吗！ 眼睛：废话来的警察要不是女的我才不往下凑合呢！ #@%￥%@！@#￥%#￥##￥%@#￥！#&*&￥%…… 马东：别吵了！干嘛呢，让大家看看，像话吗？你推我我推你，就这么个推法？能推得干净吗？ 耳、眼、鼻、嘴：不能！ 马东：能彻底解决问题吗？ 耳、眼、鼻、嘴：不能！ 马东：关键时刻，还得靠我！ 耳、眼、鼻、嘴：啊？ 马东：我跟你们说明天交通队，咱谁都不用去！ 耳、眼、鼻、嘴：怎么了？ 马东：我给警察那个驾照啊， 耳、眼、鼻、嘴：啊！ 马东：是白岩松的！ 耳、眼、鼻、嘴：全推了！