胖纸没烦恼
这个剧本是我带着我的学生练过的,笑点比较多,你参考一下吧。The Fox and the Tiger旁白:I think everybody knows the Chinese story 狐假虎威. You know the fox cheat the tiger. When the tiger knew the truth, he felt very angry. He hated the fox very much. Can you imagine when the fox meet with the tiger again, what will happen? One day, a new story happens. (一) 琵琶弹奏:《金蛇狂舞》 场景:狐狸在前面跑,老虎在后面追。老虎一把揪住狐狸,喘三口气后,将狐狸翻转过来。 老虎:(暴怒地,用手指指着狐狸的鼻子)You cheat me last time. Cheat me! How dare you! Now, you are dying. Ah ha ha ha! 狐狸:(背过头去,小声地):Oh, unlucky! What shall I do? (回过头来,可怜地):I feel very sorry for cheating you last time,but, but ,but……(左顾右盼) 老虎:(疑惑地)But what? 狐狸:(推脱中)But…….(眼睛往远处上下打量,迷恋状,脚不由自主地走出去)Beautiful! 老虎:(一把将狐狸拽回来) What? 狐狸:(向远处努努嘴)You girl friend Linda! Look, she’s there! 老虎:(傻呼呼,左右张望,急忙放手去找)Where? Where? Linda!(狐狸乘机溜走)(l老虎望着空空如也的手) I hate fox!(气得上窜下跳) 狐狸:Aa ha ha ha(二) 旁白:Unfortunately, after a few days, the tiger meet with the fox again. 老虎在森林里又遇到了溜达中的狐狸,又一下子冲上去把狐狸压在爪下。 (琵琶拨一下弦,以示紧张的情绪。) 老虎:(暴怒地)Now, you can make a choice. You want me bite you head first or your fat leg first? (先抚摩狐狸的头发,再打量狐狸的腿) 狐狸:(回过头去,表情像遇到鬼)Oh my God!(又回过头来,非常可怜状)(二胡《梁祝》响起) Oh, oh, oh, oh, help yourself to some fox please. I hate myself, too.(狐狸捂着脸痛苦地跪下)My mother says I’m not a good boy. I always tell lies.(狐狸突然蹿起来) But, they say, tiger is a kind of strong animal. Maybe the strongest animal in the world. Before I die, can you show me how strong you are? 老虎:(得意极了,做出各种健美展示姿势)Of course. I’m a great animal. I’m proud of myself. 狐狸:(试探地)I heard there was a Chinese called 刘翔. He can cover 110 meters in 10 seconds. Can you? 老虎:(想想就好笑)Wa ha ha ha ! wa ha ha ha! Poor mankind! How slow! Wash your eyes! (老虎用手将狐狸的脑袋推开)Look!(老虎一溜烟跑了起来) 狐狸:(挥挥手,远远望去)sa yu na la! (二胡配轻松得意的音乐) (三) 旁白:Now, fate plays another joke on the fox .He meet with the tiger again. 老虎变聪明了躲在树后面,一下子扑住了狐狸。 狐狸:(不解地)Who? 老虎:(意味深长地)Your old friend! Tiger! 狐狸:(装傻地)Oh, haven’t see you for a long time. How are you?(狐狸帮老虎整理领子,用袖子帮老虎擦衣服) 老虎:(阴险地)Very very nice! Now, I see my lunch. Delicious!(狐狸听了脚抖) 狐狸:(打喷嚏)a ti ! a ti ! (煞有介事地)I admit I’ve cheat you for 3 times. But, you know, it’s all for your sake. 老虎:(疑惑地)For my sake? 狐狸:(可怜巴巴地)Yes. To tell the truth, I’m not a normal fox! 老虎:(不甘示弱地)I’m not a normal tiger, too. 狐狸:(娓娓道来) I looked it up in the dictionary, and I know, in Chinese, they call me 果子狸。 老虎:(没明白)果子狸? 狐狸:(一拍脑袋,假装想起来)Oh, I forget, you can’t speak Chinese! 老虎:(得意地,想想就好笑地)Wa ha ha ha! Wa ha ha ha ! My mother always tell me :to learn a foreign language is very important! I’ve learnt Chinese in school! Am I great! (突然醒悟过来)Wait, what did you say? Chinese call you what? 狐狸:果子狸。 老虎:果子狸?SARS? 非典? 狐狸:(点点头)Yes! 老虎:(放开手,大叫着跑了)wa ya!(边跑,边擦手) (四) 旁白:From then on, fox become the real King of the forest. 二胡演奏We are the champion 狐狸大摇大摆地走在前面,后面有两个小喽罗在敲背。一个小喽罗敲得重了。狐狸把手一挥。Go! Go! Go! 将其赶走。 狐狸走在台中,大笑起来:Ah ha ha ha ha! Ah ha ha ha ha! 期间,夹杂着老虎的哭声
早秋2013
您好!《麦琪的礼物》双语剧本:Mon.:Tomorrow will be Christmas. But Della feels very sad. Because she has no money to buy a present for her husband , Jim . She has only one dollar and eighty-seven cents . They have only 20 dollars a week, it doesn’t leave much for saving.旁白:明天是圣诞节,但是德拉觉得很难过,因为她无钱为她丈夫吉姆买一圣诞礼物,她只有1.87美元,他们一个月只有20美元的收入,那很难再从中省钱了。In fact, Della and Jim have two possessions in which they both take very great pride. One is Jim’s gold watch, which has been his father’s and his grandfather’s. The other is Della’s long beautiful hair.事实上,德拉和吉姆有两件让他们引以为豪的宝贝,一件是吉姆的金表,那是从他祖父和父亲那里留传下来的,还有一件是德拉那一头棕发,又长又美丽。D: Life is so hard for me. Though I saved the money for many months , I still have only one dollar and eighty seven cents.德拉:生活对我来说很困难,虽然我很多个月以前就开始存钱了,我仍然只有1.87美元。D: I—- I—- I have to have my hair cut and sold it . In that way I can get some money and I can buy a beautiful present for Jim.德拉:我……我……我不得不剪了头发去卖掉,那样我就能得到一些钱去买礼物给吉姆了。(At the shop—“Madame Sofronie. We Buy Hair Goods of All Kinds”)(在店门口,写着“夫人:我们买各种各样的头发”)D: Will you buy my hair?德拉:你买我的头发吗?M: Yes, I buy all kinds of hair. Sit down, please. Take your hat off and let me have a look. Oh, very beautiful. Very good! Twenty dollars , OK?夫人:是的,我们买各式的头发,把你的帽子脱下来,让我看一下你的头发。哦,很美的头发,很好的发质,20美元,行不行?D: All right. But please give it to me quickly.德拉:好的,但是请你快点把钱给我。M: Here you are. Twenty dollars.夫人:给你,20美元。D: Thank you. Bye.德拉:谢谢你,再见。M: Bye.夫人:再见。Mon.:Della spent two hours in the streets. Then she stopped at a Gold Shop and bought a gold watch chain. Now ,Della is at home.旁白:德拉在街上逛了2个小时,然后她在一家金店止步,进去买了一条金表链。现在德拉正在家里。D: Oh, what a beautiful gold watch chain. I think it must match Jim’s watch. When he sees it he must be very happy .德拉:哦,多么漂亮的金链子,我想那一定跟吉姆的手表很配,当他看到它的时候,一定会很高兴的。(Suddenly the door opened and in came Jim . )(突然门打开了,吉姆走了进来)J: You—–?吉姆:你……?D: Jim. Don’t look at me that way. I had my hair cut off and sold it because I couldn’t have lived through Christmas without giving you a present. Jim, it will grow quickly. You don’t mind, do you ? I just had to do it. My hair grows very fast, you know. Say “Merry Christmas!” Jim, and let’s be happy.德拉:吉姆,不要那样看着我,我剪了我的头发并卖了,因为我无法度过一个我不送你圣诞节礼物的圣诞节,吉姆,它会长得很快的,你不会介意的,是不是?我必须这么做,我的头发长得很快的,这你是知道的,说:“圣诞快乐!”,吉姆,让我们高兴起来。J: You’ve cut off your hair?吉姆:你剪了你的头发?D: I’ve cut it off and sold it. It’s sold. I tell you -sold and gone, too. It’s Christmas Eve , Jim. Be good to me, for it went for you.德拉:我剪了头发并卖了,它被卖掉了,我跟你说它被卖掉了,没有了!现在是圣诞节前夜,对我好一点,吉姆,那都是为了你。J: Well , Della. Don’t make any mistake about me. I don’t think there’s anything about a hair cut that could make me love you any less. I know, it went for me. Look at this package .吉姆:哦,德拉,别误会我,我想我不会因为你剪了头发而对你的爱就减少了,我知道,那是为了我,看看这个包裹。D: What ?德拉:什么?J: Look at it yourself. You ‘ll see.吉姆:你自己看吧!你会明白的。D:Ah! The combs. They were in the shop windows for many months!德拉:啊,是梳子!它们就是几个月前陈列在橱窗里的那套。J:Yes, the beautiful combs, pure tortoiseshell, with jewelry rims–just the color to wear in your beautiful, hair.吉姆:是的,那套漂亮的梳子,镶珠宝的,那颜色正好配你的发色。D: But , Jim. They are expensive combs. I know, my heart had longed for them without the least hope of possession. Now they are mine. Thank you Jim.德拉:但是,吉姆,那些都是很贵的,我知道,我一直渴望但却没有丝毫的奢望拥有它。现在,它们是我的了,谢谢你,吉姆。J; Now, you will see why I was upset at first.吉姆:现在,你知道我为什么一开始就那么悲伤了吧。D: Jim, you don’t know what a nice –what a beautiful , nice gift I’ve got for you. Can you guess?德拉:吉姆,我给你买了一件又美丽又好的礼物,你能猜出来吗?J: I’m sorry. I won’t guess.吉姆:对不起,我猜不到。D: Look. A gold watch chain. Isn’t it lovely ,Jim? I hunted all over the town to find it. You’ll have to look at the time a hundred times a day now. Give me your watch. I want to see how it looks on it .德拉:看,一条金表链,吉姆,它是不是很可爱?我找遍了整个城才找的,你从现在起可得一天要看一百次时间了。把你的表给我,我想看一下表链装在表上的样子。J: Della, Let’s put our Christmas gifts away and keep them a while. They’re too nice to use just at present. I sold the watch to get the money. And I bought the combs. Now, Let’s have our supper.吉姆:德拉,让我们把圣诞礼物收起来珍藏一段时间,它们太好了,但我们现在用不着,我把表卖了。得到了钱才买了这梳子。现在让我们吃晚饭吧希望以上信息可以帮到您,也欢迎登陆中票在线官网查询你喜欢明星的演出资讯: :-D
火焰天堂
英语短剧剧本1Three Times’ Beating Monster人物:T唐僧 S:孙悟空 E:猪八戒 J:沙僧 B:白骨精 B1:B变成的村姑 B2:B变成的太婆 B3:B变化成的老头 N:哪吒T: Emitofo,do you know where we are now?S: Bajie,map!E: (摸出,递给S)S: Look,master (凑近T)………(T、S一齐转向E)T: Bajie!How Many times I have told you, nof to bring these pictures of beautiful girls with you!E: Oh,master!Forgive me(伸手拿回)T: (缩手)I’ll keep it for you until we reach the westE: But……T: Emitofo,nothing is lust,lust is nothing! Map?E: (递)Here.Em…… we have arrived in White Tiger Mountain!Ah I can’t walk on any more!(坐)My stomach doesn’t allow So.S: Fat Pig!E: Monkey,if you dare to say these two words once again,I will ,I will……….S: You will what(凶相)?E: (软禁)I will help you catch fleas(跳蚤).S: Hm!T:(轻咳)Wukong,factually,I am a bit hungry Could you go to get me some food?E: You see ,master is hungry,too!T: Baijie!Don’t forget who ate my last meal!J: But master,if a monster comes while brother monkeg is away…..T: Em…….It is a problem.Wukong,do you have any idea?S: No problem!(安装)(B已躲在一旁偷看)E: This is…..?S: Electric net!I have learnt the energy of electricity from master’s books. So I made this. No monster can approach you if you stay in it!T: Em……Wukong, you are becoming more and more scientific! Emitofo, knowledge is power!S: Bye!(走)T: Let’s play cards!(三人开始打牌)音乐《斗地主》B: Hm!Hm!Electric net?You are too childish.(变成B1)B1: (接近三人,望着)Can I join you?T: I’m sorry,lady. We are playing Fighting Against Landlord and three people are enough.B1: (在一旁观看)Oh,Chance! Bomb!T: Bomb?(打出)B1: Double King!T: Oh….I win! Em……,Lady,you are a master-hand. Come in and teach me!(准备开电网门)S: (回来,看见B1)Oh,monster!(上前就打)B1: (倒)Ah……T: (气愤)Wukong! Look what have done! She is my teacher!S: She is a monster!T: Nonsense!(深呼吸)S: Oh,please don’t……T:It’s too late!(唱)Once more……you open the door…(泰坦尼克主题曲,走音离谱)S: Please,Please,oh,no……(痛苦抱头)T: (呛住,咳)Wukong,I’m disappointed with you!B: (真身出现)Hm!Sun Wukong, I’ll teach you a lesson!(变成太婆)B2:Hello,have you seen my daughter?T: Daughter?...(连忙挡住地尸体)No,sorry!(陪笑,B2想看后面是什么,T挡)S: (咬牙切齿)You monster, I’ll beat you into hell!(S追打B2,B2躲至T身后,S打,不想打到T头,T晕,S再打死B2)E&J: Are you Ok, master?(扶T)J: Look,(伸食指)how many?T:Two…..(晕乎乎地)Sun Wukong, game over!(变成B3)B3: (看到B1,B2尸体)Oh….,my daughter, my wife! Who did it?!!(哭喊)S: I’ll kill you, monster!(打)T: (想阻止,未及)You,you.....(险些晕,E,J扶住 )You have killed three lives!S: No,they are not human beings!They are created by monster!T: Monster?You are a real monster!Never let me see you,go!!S: (悲,离去)(音乐,营造 “假”悲伤气氛)《人鬼情未了》E: Master, brother Monkey is.......T: Scratch! Don't mention that guy any more!B: (出现) Ha,ha,ha!(三尸体B1,B2,B3在B招手后“飘”走)T: (惊)You are......B: How foolish you are ,Mr Tang!(E,J去阻斗,被击退)B: (抓住T)I'll enjoy your meat and blood,ha,ha......S: (悄悄走到B后,打B,B晕)A thousand years later.T: Wukong?E: Oh,Brother Monkey!J: Our hero is back!T: I,I can't understand......What happened?S: Master,your IQ needs increasing! This monster changed its appearance into three shapes in order to cheat you!T: How,how did you find out?S: (沉默).......Monkey's intuition(直觉)N: Excuse me, where is the cniminal?S; Ah......you are too late ,Nezha!(对T)I've called the police.N: (摇醒B)You are under arrest .(出示证件)You have the right to remain silent If you give up the right, anything you will say can and will be against you in a court of law!(带走B)T: Wukong(S不理T)I admit my mistake this time(S仍不理)I'm sorry(小声)S: What?T: I'm sorry.S: Em? Louder,please?T: I......am......sorry.....(S 捂耳)(音乐响)《敢问路在何方》(这个放伴奏)T: Let's go guys!( 歌)S: You are carrying the luggage, I am leading the horse.E: Say goodbye to the sun, Welcome evening glow.J: Sleeping on the ground, again we set out set out, again we set out.T.S.E.J: Ah......Ah...... Sleeping on the ground again we set out.T: One after the other the seasons go by,and ohe after the other, the year go on. You wonder where the road is. The road is under your feet.T.S.E.J: You uonder where the road is, the road is under your feet......(谢幕)
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