英文版小品

一搜就有，何愁之有！！

A little boy asked his father: Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?The father replied: I don 't know son. I 'm still paying!!一个小男孩问他的爸爸，结婚要花多少钱？爸爸说：我不知道，因为我仍然在付帐。

发原稿？好的。羊肉串和纳税人（英文小品）Characters:Mr. Shi, Xiaofu, DabaoMr. Shi: Tax is the major source of the fiscal revenue. There is an evident change about the relationship between the tax collector and taxpayer in the past 20 years. Now, the tax collector, Xiaofu, and the tax payer Dabao, a vendor selling Yangrouchuan will show you the very change. The first Act happened in 1980s.Act I(in Bazaar of Beijing, sanlihe, 1980s)Dabao: Yangrouchuan , yangrouchuan, eaten one ,want nine, eaten one, want nine.Hi, Take my yangrouchuan.(slipped, take it up, )Xiaofu: Tax! Pay the tax!Dabao: (change faces)Taxi? Where is the taxi? Here’s no taxi.Xiaofu: Tax! T---A ---X!Dabao: What’s the tax? I just know taxi! Do you want me to call a taxi for you?Taxi----! Taxi----!Xiaofu: Enough! Are you the vendor?Dabao: No , No, No, no! I 'm just have a look. The vendor has gone to the toilet.Xiaofu: Not the vendor ? Impossible! you 've been here for 2 hours.Dabao: Really ? (Xiaofu: Yes, of course.)How do you know it?Xiaofu: The window of my office is open to here and I 've been looking at you for two hours.Dabao: It’s a big bug!Xiaofu: Oh. Don’t waste my time! Please pay the tax---- 10 Yuan!Dabao: 10 yuan?! My god. I had just earned 20 Yuan one day! 5 Yuan, ok?Xiaofu: Don't cheat me, you've sold more than 2 hundred ones.Dabao: 6yuan, my dear sisiter.7Yuan, my lovely beauty.Dabao: Not for you ,not for me, let's split the difference. 8 yuan ,ok ?Xiaofu: (looking around) All right ,a deal. But no receipt.(Dabao payed 8 yuan and Xiaofu left)Dabao: What a smart woman! Bad luck! I’m bankrupt. I have to change my place.Hope I would not meet her any more! Let’s go!Act IIMr. Shi: The next scene happened in new century. China had been marching in the way of the market economy for twenty years more, in the new era of building the well-off society in an all-round way, how do the vendor regard tax as and how is the tax collected? The scene will tell you.Let’s enjoy it!(In the market; Dabao in white clothes ,a board with "NO SARS")Dabao:: Yangrouchuan, yangrouchuan. Eaten one, want nine. Eaten one, want nine.Xiaofu: Hi,Dabao: Hi.Two: What a familiar face.Two: It’s you!Dabao: 10 years past, you are a still a tax collector.Xiaofu: 10 years past, you still sell Yangrouchuan.How is your business?Dabao: Everything is OK!10 years past, you are still beautiful lady in Sanlihe of Beijing.Xiaofu: 10 years past, you and your Yangrouchuan look more clean than 20 years before.Dabao: Thank you. No SARS, no dirtiness; Serve people, serve me.Xiaofu: Great! Have you……Dabao: Married? I ‘m not married; I’m still single.Xiaofu: Have you claimed your tax this month?Dabao: What? Taxi? Oh, tax! Of course. I should pay the tax of 50 Yuan this month and I have claimed at the begin of this month.Xioafu: Your receipt, please.Dabao: (shows the receipt )Here you are, I have paid my tax in the tax service center by computer.Xiaofu: Great! What a good taxpayer you are.Dabao: Thank you. It is my duty. I’m proud of myself to pay the tax for our country.Xiaofu: Yeah! The tax you paid is a share of our country’s economy, and you do a lot for Olympics of Beijing!Dabao: Let’s do it together! . It’s said that, Don't ask what your country can do for you but ask what you can do for your country. Just like me, sell Yangrouchuan, and pay the Tax for ten years more.Xiaofu: You 're the loveliest people in new century!Dabao: Thank you! And you 're the loveliest tax collector in new era!X: Excuse me, and I have to go now. Bye-bye.D: A moment, are you free tomorrow evening? Could I have a dinner with you?Xiaofu: Well, may I have the company of my husband?Dabao: No, no, no problem. 6 o’clock in the evening, Beichuanyuan, ok?Xiaofu: just a kidding. I have to go home now.(leaves)Dabao, See you tomorrow.Dabao: Hope to see you everyday.The End

一秒钟与一百万A Second and A Million Dollars A man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?" and God says: "A penny", then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?" and God says: "a second", then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?" and God says "In a second" 一男子进入教堂和上帝对话.他问:"主啊, 一百万美元对你意味着多少?"上帝回答:"一便士."男子又问:"那一百万年呢?"上帝说:"一秒钟."最后男子请求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士吗?"上帝回答:"过一秒钟."