Krystaldxe
英语笑话20字带翻译
英语笑话20字带翻译一：
A boy goes to the cinema. He buys a ticket and goes in. But after two or three minutes he comes out. He buys a second ticket and goes in again. After a few minutes he comes out again and buys a third ticket. Two or three minutes after that he comes out a third time and asks for another ticket. The ticket seller says to him, "Why are you buying all these? Are you meeting friends in the cinema all the time?" "No, I;m not doing that." The small man says, "But a big woman always stops me at the door and tears my tickets up."
英语笑话20字带翻译二：
It was half-past eight in the morning. The telephone rang and Mary went to answer it.'Hello, who's that?' she asked.'It's me--Peter.'Peter was a friend of Mary's eight-year-old brother, Johnny.'Oh, hello, Peter. What do you want?' said Mary.'Can I speak to Johnny?''No,' said Mary, 'you can't speak to him now. He is busy. He is getting ready for school. He is eating his breakfast. Grandmother is combing his hair. Sister is under the table, putting his shoes on. Mother is getting his books and putting them in his school bag. Goodbye, I've got to go now. I have to hold the door open. The school bus is coming.'
英语笑话20字带翻译三：
The preacher was vexed(生气的) because a certain member of his congregation(集合，聚会) always fell asleep during the sermon.As the man was snoring in the front row one Sunday, the preacher determined he would teach him not to sleep during the sermon. So, in a whisper, he asked the congregation. "All who want to go to heaven, please rise." Everyone got up except the snorer. After whispering "Be seated", the minister shouted at the top of hisvoiced, "All those who want to be with the devil, please rise."Awaking with a start , the sleepy-head jumped to his feet and saw the preacher standing tall and angry in the pulpit(讲道坛), "Well, sir," he said, "I don't know what we're voting on, but it looks like you and me are the only ones for it."
牧师非常生气，因为总有一个人在他说教时打瞌睡。一个星期天，正当坐在前排的那个人又在瞌睡时，牧师决定要好好教育他一下，让他不要再在布道时睡觉。于是他低声对信徒们说：“想去天堂的人，都请站起来吧。”所有的`人都站了起来——当然，除了那个打瞌睡的人。在低声说过请坐后，牧师高声喊道：“想去下地狱的人请站起来!”打瞌睡的人被这突然的喊叫声惊醒了，他站了起来。看到牧师高站在教坛上，正生气的看着他。这个人说道：“噢，先生，我不知道我们在选什么，但看上去只有你和我是候选人。”
闹闹美食家
英语简短笑话大全
导语：阅读笑话，为生活创造更多的快乐。以下是我整理的英语简短笑话大全，欢迎各位的阅读与参考。
英语简短笑话【1】
顾客：小心，你的大拇指在我汤里了!
服务员：别担心，先生，不是很烫!
Diner: Watch out! Your thumbs in my soup!
Waiter: Don't worry, Sir, it's not that hot!
英语简短笑话【2】
一个服务员给顾客拿来了牛排，大拇指在牛肉上。
“你疯了吗?”顾客喊到，“你的`手在我的牛排上!”
“什么?”服务员说，“你想让它再掉地上?”
A waiter brings the customer the steak he ordered with his thumb over the meat.
"Are you crazy?" yelled the customer, "with your hand on my steak?"
"What" answers the waiter, "You want it to fall on the floor again?"
英语简短笑话【3】
服务员：茶或咖啡?先生。
第一个顾客：我要茶
第二个顾客：我也是茶——杯子要干净的!
服务员：两杯茶，哪个要干净的杯子?
Waiter: "Tea or coffee, gentlemen?"
1st customer: "I'll have tea."
2nd customer: "Me, too - and be sure the glass is clean!"
(Waiter exits, returns)
Waiter: "Two teas. Which one asked for the clean glass?"
英语简短笑话【4】
服务员，这只苍蝇在我汤里干什么?
看起来象是在仰泳，先生……
Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?
Um, looks to me to be backstroke, sir...
英语简短笑话【5】
服务员，汤里有只苍蝇!
别担心，先生，面包里的蜘蛛会干掉它。
Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
Don't worry sir, the spider on the breadroll will get 'em.
英语简短笑话【6】
服务员，我汤里有只苍蝇!
不是，先生，那是蟑螂，苍蝇在你牛排里。
Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
No sir, that's a cockroach, the fly is on your steak.
英语简短笑话【7】
服务员，汤里有只苍蝇!
别让别人看见，先生，要不别人都要。
Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
Keep it down sir, or they'll all be wanting one.
英语简短笑话【8】
服务员，汤里有只苍蝇!
我知道，先生，我们没有另收钱。
Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
Its OK, Sir, there's no extra charge!
英语简短笑话【9】
服务员，汤里有只苍蝇!
对不起，先生，我弄走那三个时忘了这个。
Waiter, there is a fly in my soup!
Sorry sir, maybe I've forgotten it when I removed the other three.
英语简短笑话【10】
服务员，汤里有只死苍蝇!
是的，先生，是开水杀死了它们。
Waiter, there's a dead fly in my soup!
Yes sir, it's the hot water that kills them.
英语简短笑话【11】
服务员，汤里有只死苍蝇!
1美元你想要什么——活的?
aiter, there's a dead fly in my soup!
What do you expect for $1 - a live one?
英语简短笑话【12】
服务员，汤里有只蜜蜂!
是的，先生，今天苍蝇放假。
Waiter, waiter, there's a bee in my soup.
Yes Sir, it's the fly's day off.
英语简短笑话【13】
服务员，来杯咖啡，不加奶油。
对不起，先生，奶油没了，不加奶怎么样?
Waiter, I'd like a cup of coffee, please, with no cream.
I'm sorry, sir, but we're out of cream. How about with no milk?
英语简短笑话【14】
服务员，你的领带在我的汤里了。
没关系，先生，它不缩水。
Waiter, your tie is in my soup!
That's all right, sir, it's not shrinkable.
