橘子的新生命
英语笑话及中文翻译
英语笑话及中文翻译一：
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen."
一位女士抱着她的宝宝上公交车，司机看到后说：“额，那是我这辈子见过的最丑的小孩。”
The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me." The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
女士走到车厢后面坐下，感到很愤怒。她对旁边的男士说：“司机刚刚羞辱了我。”男士回应说：“你快上去斥责他。去吧，我替你抱着你的猴子。”
【注释】
1. fume - to be angry about something 发怒，生气
常用介词搭配：fume at/over/about
例如：fume about what he said 对他所说的话感到生气
2. tell somebody off 斥责，责骂
tell somebody off for doing something 因为某人做某事而责骂他/她
例如：The boss is always telling me off for being late, even though he is late every day! 我的老板总拿迟到的事斥责我，即便他自己天天迟到!
英语笑话及中文翻译二：
A woman whose husband often came home drunk decided to cure him of the habit. One Halloween night, she put on a devil suit and hid behind a tree to intercept him on the way home.
一位妇人发现丈夫回家的时候总是烂醉如泥，她决定为丈夫治好这个毛病。一个万圣节夜里，她穿上一套魔鬼戏服，躲在树后，准备在丈夫返家时拦截他的去路。
When her husband came by, she jumped out and stood before him with her red horns, long tail, and pitchfork.
当丈夫走近时，她从树后跳出来，站到他面前，头上带着红色的羊角、身后有长长的尾巴，手中握着钢叉。
"Who are you?" he asked.
“你是谁?”丈夫问到。
"I'm the Devil!" she responded.
“我是魔鬼!”她回答到。
"Well, come on home with me," he said, "I married your sister!"
“噢，那你跟我一起回家吧，”丈夫说，“我娶了你的姐妹!”
【注释】
1. cure of 是一个在各种英语阅读文章中经常出现的习语，它的意思有两大分支，一是医疗范畴上的对疾病的救治;二是生活习惯范畴上的对坏习惯的`矫正。
The medicine should cure you of your cold. 这药应该能治好你的感冒。
Parents try to cure their children of bad habits. 父母们想办法纠正孩子们的坏习惯。
2. 西方文化中的魔鬼形象：
在西方国家的文献、小说、影视作品中，魔鬼常被描述为一个有角有尾巴、手拿长柄叉、在烈火熊熊的地狱里折磨人的怪物。
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英语笑话带翻译100字
英语笑话带翻译100字一：
Bill is a good student and an intelligent boy. He likes to study arithmetic, and he can do all of the arithmetic problems in his book easily.One day on his way to school Bill passed a fruit store. There was a sign in the window which said, Apple-Six for five cents. An idea came to Bill and he went into the store.How much are the apples? he asked the store.Six for five cents.But I don't want six apples.How many apples do you want?It is not a question of how many apples I want. It is a problem in arithmetic.What do you mean by a problem in arithmetic? asked the man.Well, if six apples are wroth five cents, then five apples are worth four cents, four apples are worth three cents, three apples are worth rwo cents, two apples are worth one cent and one apple is worth nothing. I only want one apple, and if one apple is worth nothing then it is not necessary for me to pay you.Bill picked out a good apple, began to eat it, and walked happily out of the store. The man looked at the young boy with such surprise that he could not say a word.
比尔是一个好学生，也是个聪明的孩子。他喜欢学数学，课本上所有的数学问题他都能不费劲地解答。有一天，在上学路上，比尔经过一家水果店。该店窗户上有个招牌上写着：苹果--五美分六个。比尔脑筋一转，进了店门。苹果怎么卖?五美分六个。但我不想要六个。你想要几个?这不是我想要几个的问题。这是个数学问题。数学问题?你说这话是什么意思?你看，如果六个苹果五美分，那么五个苹果四美分，四个苹果三美分，三个苹果二美分，二个苹果一美分，一个苹果就不要钱。我只要一个苹果，如果一个苹果一分钱也不要的话，那我也就没必要给你钱了。比尔拣了一个好苹果，开始吃了起来，然后兴高采烈地迈出了店门。那个售货员吃惊地望着这个小男孩，一句话也说不出来。
英语笑话带翻译100字二：
On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: "Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?"To which the farmer replied: "Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!"
在一个乡村路上，一警察让这个农民靠边停车，说：“先生，你意识到你的妻子在几公里前从车上掉下去了吗?”农民回答说：“感谢上帝，我还以为我聋了呢!”
英语笑话带翻译100字三：
A young couple was becoming anxious about their four-year-old son, who had not yet talked. They took him to specialists, but the doctors found nothing wrong with him.Then one morning at breakfast the boy suddenly blurted, "Mom, the toast is burned.""You talked! You talked!" shouted his mother. "I'm so happy! But why has it taken this long.""Well, up till now," said the boy, "things have been okay."
一对年轻的'夫妇对于他们四岁的儿子仍然不会说话这件事非常着急。他们带他去看专家，但是医生们找不出任何不正常的地方。之后有一天早上，这个男孩突然说道：“妈妈，面包拷糊了。”“你说话了!你说话了!”他的妈妈嚷道。“我真高兴!但是为什么要我们等这么长的时间呢?”“嗯，直到现在，”男孩说，“每件事都很正常啊。”
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