长草的燕窝
民间笑话是一种颇受人们喜爱的民间叙事类型,材料丰富,有广泛的现实基础。但是它却一直被学界视为不登大雅之堂的小众。我精心收集了小学简单的英语笑话，供大家欣赏学习!
A middle aged woman was driving through a school zone when a policeman pulled her over for speeding. As he was giving her the ticket, she said, "How come I always get a ticket and everyone else gets a warning? Is it my face?"
"No, ma'am," explained the officer, "it's your foot."
A little girl goes to visit Santa at the Mall. When it is her turn she sits on his lap and Santa says "Have you been good?"
Little Girl, "Yes, Santa, very good."
Santa, "What would you like for Christmas?"
Little Girl, "I want Barbie and G. I. Joe."
Santa, "G. I. Joe? Doesn't Barbie come with Ken?
Little Girl, "No, Santa, Barbie fakes it with Ken. But she comes with G. I. Joe."
A father came home from a long business trip to find his son riding a new 21 speed mountain bike. "Where did you get the money for the bike? It must have cost $300.""Easy, Dad," little Johnny replied. "I earned it hiking.""Come on Johnny," the father said. "Tell me the truth.""That is the truth," Johnny replied. "Every night you were gone, Mom's boss, Mr. Reynolds, would come over to see Mom. He'd give me a $20 bill and tell me to take a hike!"
The Smith's were proud of their family tradition.
Their ancestors had come to America on the Mayflower and the family included Senators and Wall Street Wizards.
The family decided to compile a family history, a legacy for their children and grandchildren. So the family hired a fine author to put together all their research notes, only one problem arose - how to handle great Uncle George, who was executed in the electric chair.
The author said not to worry for he could handle the story tactfully, so the book appeared and it said...
"Great Uncle George occupied a chair of applied electronics at an important government institution."
"He was attached to his position by the strongest of ties, and his death came as a great shock."
On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: "Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?"
To which the farmer replied: "Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!"
伊月寒水20
The wolf and the fox wanted to eat the rabbit, but it wasn't easy to catch him. One day the wolf said to the fox, "You go home and lie in bed. I'll tell the rabbit that you are dead. When he comes to look at you, you can jump up and catch him." That's a good idea," said the fox. He went home at once. The wolf went to the rabbit's house and knocked at the door. "Who is it?" asked the rabbit. "It's the wolf. I've come to tell you that the fox is dead." Then the wolf went away. The rabbit went to the fox's house. He looked in through the window and saw the fox lying in bed with his eyes closed. He thought, "Is the fox really dead or is he pretending to be dead? If he's not dead, he'll catch me when I go near him." so he said, "The wolf says that the fox is dead. But he doesn't look like a dead fox. The mouth of a dead fox is always open." When the fox heard this, he thought, "I'll show him that I'm dead." So he opened his mouth. The rabbit knew that the fox wasn't dead, and he ran as quickly as he could. 狼和狐狸想要吃掉兔子，但是这只兔子太难抓到了。 一天，狼对狐狸说：“你回家假装躺在床上。我去告诉兔子你已经死了。当他来看你的时候，你就可以跳起来抓住他了。”“真是个好主意！”狐狸说。 于是他立刻回到家。狼去兔子的房前敲了敲门，“是谁啊？”兔子问道。“狼，我是来告诉你狐狸已经死了。”说完狼就走开了。 兔子去狐狸家看情况。他通过狐狸家的窗户看到闭着眼睛的狐狸躺在床上。他想，狐狸是真的死了，还是在假装呢？如果他没有死，那么我走近他就会被他抓住。于是他说：“狼说狐狸死了。但是他看起来并不像死掉了呀。死去的狐狸通常都是张着嘴的。”狐狸听到这些话就想：我得证明自己是真的死了。于是他张开了嘴巴。 这时兔子知道狐狸并没有死，他就以最快的速度跑开啦。 这篇英语故事告诉我们：不要被假象迷惑，凡事多多求证才能防患于未然。
