不差钱英语剧本

某进口名车专卖店门前，小沈阳停下摩托车，男销售迎出。In front of a car shop, XiaoShenyang(此处尊中国特色，直接为“小沈阳”) stopped his motorcycle, and then a male saleperson got out.A：对不起大哥，我们这里是进口名车专卖店，门口不能停放摩托车。A: sorry sir, here we sell imported fancy cars, please do not park here.B：不是，小伙子，我是来买车的，你看我不像么？B: well, fellow, im here to buy those cars. don't i look like a car buyer?A：不太像！A: Not really!B：兄弟，我今天买车很重要，你可得招待好了。我下星期要结婚，可我女朋友非要我在你们进口名车专卖店给她买辆汽车，要不然就不结婚。她一会儿就来，我赶在她前面先来问问行情。你们这儿随随便便一辆名车得卖多少钱？B: Well, buddy, it's important for me today to buy a car, so please be serious. i am getting married next week, while my gf tells that i have to get her a car here, or the wedding will not go on. she will be here later, and im here now to get familiar with the market. so, what a really fancy car cost here?A：一两百万吧？A: over a million, or two.B：一……两百万哪？咋那么贵呢？啥材料做的？B: million? two million? how could be that dear? what do they make from?!A：不是材料问题，是品牌值钱，我们卖的都是豪华名车，啥名车都有。A: not about what they make from, but the BRAND costs! we sell really fancy cars here, really luxury ones, whatever brands you want.B：兄弟这样，我给你一百块钱。B: well, buddy, this is a hundred yuan for you.A：啥意思，你要买啥？A: what's up? what do you want?B：一百块钱能买啥？这是给你的小费。我都说是来买名车的人了，还给不起你小费？B: what's a hundred yuan for!? this is my tip for you. i am here to buy a so dear car, a tip is exactly normal.A：哎呀大哥，你真敞亮，你太帅了！A: oh, dude, you are good! (美剧经常有吧，兄弟，你着实不错啊 的意思)B：还帅呢，我跟你讲，这100块钱不是白给，等下我女朋友来了，你得帮着配合点儿。B: don't be that happy. i am GOOD for a reason. you know, i need you to be cooperative when my gf is here later.A：咋配合啊？A: how?B：其实我的意思，买车不在乎贵贱，总不是一开？代个步而已。大哥我不差钱，也就是觉得买名车太浪费。所以待会儿我女朋友来了，我想你既不能把那些名贵车推荐给我，你又还得给我面子，别让女朋友觉得我没钱。明白我意思没？B: in fact, i don't really want a fancy luxury car. anyway, it is just for travelling. but you know, i am rick, i have the money that i do not want to spend on so expensive cars. so, when my gf is here, i want you not to recommend expensive luxury cars. but in the meantime, you also have to help me save my face with my gf. i don't want her feel im poor. got it?A：……B：比方说，我要是找你买比较贵的车……B: so, what if i ask for a expensive car?A：那我就说没有呗！A: i will say none in store!B：哎呀小伙子，你太厉害了，太有悟性了！好了，我女朋友来了，看见没？就门口穿红衣服那位。B: wow, buddy, you are good, very good! well, my gf is here now. see? the one in red there.A：放心吧，保证二位满意！A: OK, All on me!片刻过后~A moment later~C：哇，亲爱的，这里都是奔驰宝马，都是名车啊！C: oh, darling, here are Mercedes-Benz and BMW, all fancy cars!B：哎哎，销售员快过来！B: hey hey, where is the saleman!A：女士、先生，两位好，请问你们要买什么车？A: good afternoon/morning/evening, what can i do for you?B：两百多万的奔驰，有吗！B: i want a Mercedes-Benz, at the price of two million!A：对不起，没有！A: sorry, none in store now!B：那一百万左右的宝马给我来一辆！B: then BMW, at the price around a million!A：对不起，没那么贵的！A: sorry, we do not have such fancy cars here!B：有什么价位的？B: so what do you have exactly?!A：有四、五十万的。A: about half million.B：四……五十万的……有……有吗？B: you have half...a...million...? A：有还是没有啊？A: really?B：这是你的店，那得问你啊。大哥我这儿不差钱，你得明白着点儿！B: you are the seller! i have the money, you should know this!A：噢，那没有！A: er, then we do not really have those cars!B：我说小伙子，你们这是啥名车专卖店呐，要啥啥没有。我四十好几的人了，找个女朋友能容易吗？我们现在着急买车结婚，你说买辆什么车好呢？B: well, buddy, are you really a fancy car shop? im over forth somehow, do you think it's easy for me to get a girl? we are now in hurry for a car, so what do you recommend?C：亲爱的，你问问他们这儿有没有奥迪车卖。C: darling, what do you think about Audi?B：有也别买，奥迪是奥拓它哥，能好到哪去？B: not that! audi is like alto, how could that be good?!C：要不，咱不买进口名车了，先买辆国产车开着吧。C: otherwise, we do not buy foreign brands, what about made-in-china?B：买国产的？也行，先开着，以后再换。来，小伙子，我们买辆奇瑞QQ！B: made in china? that's ok. after all we can change another one years later. so, buddy, we want a chery qq!A：没有！A: None!B：这个……可以有！B: THIS can be ok!A：这个……真没有！A: THIS really none.B：这样，我给你带来了，这是奇瑞专卖店的电话，你打电话调货过来。B: ok, here you are, this is the phone number of the chery store, you can phone them to get one here.A：妈呀，没这么做过呀！A: oh god, this never happend before!B：那是我没来，我要早来了，你们早这么做了。B: that's because i never came before~A：这大哥，真太抠了！A: what a dude, so mean!B：小伙子你看，今天我们也是带着十二分诚意来你们进口名车专卖店的，等会儿我们就要提车了，你不得搭配送个礼包啥的？B: you see, buddy. we come here with exact faith in your store, so don't you think a gift bag would be more appropriate?A：送太阳膜、地胶、真皮、脚垫对啵？哎呀我说大哥，你也太抠门儿了，合着你在我们店一辆车都没买，我们店里还倒贴进去几千块钱呐！A: solar film? rubber? leather? foot pad? well, dude, you cann't be that mean! how can we pay another thousand yuan when you spend nothing here?B：我说小伙子，不是我们一辆车没买，是我们要买奔驰宝马你都没有。B: well i say, buddy, it's not our fault not to spend a penny here, but you do not have the M-BENZ or BMW for us.A：我有没有你心里还没数吗？A: you know exactly what's the truth!B：我有啥数？不是你说都没有吗？B: what truth? wasn't that you said you had none of those?!A：别说话了，一会要弄出个有来咋整啊?A: seal up! what if there IS ONE later?B：到底有没有你说清楚，大哥我这儿是差钱还是咋地？B: be sure please, yes or none! you think im poor? no money for that?A：我知道大哥你不差钱，我的意思，你好容易攒钱买辆车，不能太在乎钱，钱花完了还可以再挣。你看我虽然是个销售员，但我总结，买车吧可得慎重，有时候一想跟吃饭一样一样的。大酒店一吃虽然贵点儿，但环境优雅心里踏实，嚎！烧烤摊儿一吃虽然便宜，但搞不好坏肚拉稀，嚎！开车时候最担心的事情你知道是什么吗？开车最担心的是开着开着，刹车没了！A: ok, i know you have the money. i think, you can't balk at money when you need and decide to get a car. money can be earnt after all. you see, even though i am just a saleperson, i think, buying a car, should be cautious, like eating a dinner. it's right that a grand hotel will be expensive, but it's secure and graceful to have dinner there; hawl! a booth or vender can be much cheaper, but it's also easy to get sick. Hawl! do you know what's the most annoying when driving? LOSING THE BRAKE!B：拉倒吧，开车时候最最担心的事情你知道是什么吗？最最担心开着开着，没钱加油了！B: no way! what is the most annoying thing when driving? NO MONEY FOR GAS!

A famous shops and small door imports of shenyang, motorcycle stop to meet the sales.A: I'm sorry eldest brother, we here is the famous shops, imported parked motor can.B: no, boy, I was to buy, you see, I don't like?A: don't like!B: my brother, a very important today, you can get a good reception. I will get married next week, but I have my girlfriend in your shop to buy her famous imports, otherwise we car not to marry. She'll come out in front of her, my first option to ask. Do you have a car sells everything off much money?A: valued?B: a... Two million? Zha so expensive? What material do?A: no problem, is the brand valuable materials, we sell are luxury cars are famous, ShaMing.B: brother, I'll give you one hundred dollars.A: what do you mean, what to buy?B: one hundred dollars to buy what? This is your tip. I have to buy that expensive car, not to your tips?A: oh, you are clear, you too handsome!B: it's nice, I tell you, this is white, a $100 to wait my girlfriend, you have to help with some.A: zha cooperate?B: actually, I mean, when buying, is not always a care? For a walk. My brother is not money, buy everything that is too good to waste. So my girlfriend came later, I think you cannot put those expensive car, I recommend you also get to my face, don't let the girl think I have no money. Know what I mean?A:...B: for example, if I find you buy more expensive car...A: then I said no bai!B: oh boy, you too much, too much understanding! Well, my girlfriend, see? The door is red.A: stop worrying, guarantee two satisfied!After a momentC: oh, dear, here is all BMW, are famous Mercedes!!!!!B: hey hey, come salesman!A: ladies and gentlemen, two good, do you want anything?B: more than 200 million Mercedes, there!A: sorry, no!B: it's about one million cars BMW give me a!!!!!A: excuse me, is not so expensive!B: what's the price?A: there are four, five.B: four... Half of... There... Do you have?A: there is no?B: is this your shop, it may ask you. Eldest brother I here is not bad, you need to know the money!A: oh, that no!B: I said, you are the guy ShaMing car, mysterious to shop. I forty, several can easily find a girlfriend? We now hurry, you say a marriage what buy a car?C: my dear, you ask them here have an audi to sell.B: there are also don't buy, audi is kept it, can go?C: otherwise, I don't buy imported yazhan sees, buy first car companies within open.B: buy domestic? Also, the first open, change again later. Here, we buy a lad, chery QQ!A: no!B: this... Can!A: this... No!B: so, I brought you, this is the telephone, you shop chery transfer call.A: mom, don't do it!B: that's I didn't come here early, I want you to do so, the earlier.A: the eldest brother, it really dig!B: boy, you see, today we also sincerely to you with extremely famous shops, import, we will wait, you may ask the collocation of car to send a gift bag what?A: TaiYangMo, rubber, leather, pads to pop? Oh, I said, you also too eldest brother, with a scrooge you in our shop to buy a car, we haven't bear also thousands of dollars in store!B: I said, not our boy didn't buy a car, are we buy Benz BMW you didn't.A: I have you haven't count?B: I have what number? Not you say no?A: don't talk, one will have to make A whole zha?B: do you have a clear, eldest brother I here is sent money or what?A: I know you don't sent money, I mean, how to save money and buy A car, can't be too care about money, money is spent can be earned. You see, though I a salesman, but I can buy it carefully, to eat, sometimes as the same. Although you eat a hotel, but elegant environment, yelping! Eat a barbecue vendor's stand is cheap, but not bad belly sparse, yelping! When the car worry about things you know what it is? Drive the worry is open, brake didn't!B: pull down, most concern when driving, you know what? Most worried about open, no money!

--！我们打个赌吧，100分肯定没有人翻，光打也打累死了啊。如果没有人翻，把分给我好伐？

Zhao Benshan: Tieling This is the most expensive hotels, Scotland flirt Maomao: Do you read the anti-Scottish sentiment, the old has been expensive Zhao Benshan: money, and 30,000, with no packet ah Maomao: I fell on the炕上 Zhao Benshan: Here you are work, but also landed a炕上 Maomao: pocket until more than 70 yuan Zhao Benshan: I still have 400 Maomao: not enough ah Zhao Benshan: enough can be the Zhao Benshan: Attendants Small Shenyang: I beg your pardon uncle, we are high-end hotels, no agricultural products Zhao Benshan: We are eating, the girl in this very important meal Small Shenyang: You Tube who told the girl, I was pure husband Zhao Benshan: how to wear a skirt Small Shenyang: nor is it a skirt, which is七分裤, it has legs, anxious Misdraw, and I said how inconvenient walk Zhao Benshan:那条腿left to others to wear, boy I tell you, today requested the important guests, you must be good hospitality Small Shenyang: No problem Zhao Benshan: you in this hotel, if a meal to eat, how much. The most expensive elements on how much to eat Small Shenyang: to 1, 20,000 yuan Zhao Benshan: whether or not this is the case, today, tomorrow, to foot the bill for dinner Small Shenyang:打白条? Zhao Benshan: No打白条, give you tips Small Shenyang: Grandpa, you太帅the Zhao Benshan: guests come, I order you to give me time to bear the expensive dishes, I point Small Shenyang: I say no Zhao Benshan: Are you too understand Maomao: Grandfather, I'm hungry Small Shenyang: 78 yuan a bowl Zhao Benshan: expensive Small Shenyang: Scotland beat Lu noodles Zhao Benshan:鲁子money is not? Small Shenyang: Do not the money! Zhao Benshan:鲁子first bowl, while the completion of the Avenue of Stars to a Teacher, you give me an indisputable face, this is the best chance in life, cultivate your Grandfather forty years Maomao: Grandfather, I have little Zhao Benshan: I train your dad many years, your dad is semi-finished products, have become cultural station, you have confidence in Maomao: Honghu water, waves more than one wave, and I want my father hit the beach Small Shenyang:鲁子to the Maomao: HAVE A LITTLE salt of the Grandfather Small Shenyang: Here you are engaging in a bowl of boiled water Small Shenyang: You are not who you, you are the protagonist, No, Bai No, the old Albert, you are a teacher you have completed Teacher to complete has come, ah Come person, now the run Zhao Benshan: What, what noisy ah, so that the wolf bite it? Small Shenyang: Teacher to the completion of phase I according to it? Bi Jian: I find Lotus Tie-Zhu Zhao County Cultural head of the Davis Zhao Benshan: I am a Tie-Zhu Zhao's father, you find a yes Bi Jian: Davis, yes Zhao Benshan: County layout is very grand, cloth a hall, a large room, a large photo on the middle, surrounded by flower Bi Jian: brother, What color flower are Zhao Benshan: white, yellow both.拿着笔people are waiting for you, excited ah Bi Jian: We have to let the township Zhao Benshan: village layout I first ate a meal in Tieling, passengers will be with the Lord, you are right in accordance with the arrangements I Small Shenyang: Teacher to complete according to a phase I Bi Jian: You are male attendants Zhao Benshan: we are fellow, you are not right person Dalian Bi Jian: Yes. Zhao Benshan: we are relatives, my grandfather lived in Dalian Bi Jian: What's the name of Maomao: a closed-door court Bi Jian: You lords very formidable playing mahjong Zhao Benshan: smile, much like when you take the old pictures, the children just like old pro, quick call a good old Maomao: Good lord. Bi Jian: The Chinese New Year lucky money also did not give you any Small Shenyang: We have not completed the Teacher camera Zhao Benshan: first a la carte Small Shenyang: how to eat after the run to do Zhao Benshan: you point it Bi Jian: We just eat Zhao Benshan: It is now well-off, and you struggle to eat, how much you eat eat Bi sword: not to eat Zhao Benshan: Australian abalone 4 Small Shenyang: no I beg your pardon. Zhao Benshan: Australian lobster Small Shenyang: not so big Zhao Benshan: how much. Small Shenyang: Only the pound. Zhao Benshan: have or not ah Small Shenyang: none. Bi Jian: shark not to point Zhao Benshan: do not have to eat, and I have a stuck eating shark fin, the last to come out用镊子hospital. What hotel are you not, hard to once you find out the boss Small Shenyang: not available Zhao Benshan: the boss does not Small Shenyang: the boss out Zhao Benshan: What to eat ah Bi Jian: to point routine Zhao Benshan: to the people, the children, to a small pheasant stewed mushrooms Small Shenyang: No Zhao Benshan: This can have Small Shenyang: This really does not Zhao Benshan: Helena to bring back Bi sword: there is no chickens Koyasan Zhao Benshan: this stew, and fool around Small Shenyang: Who is the idiot you say? Zhao Benshan: stupid egg Small Shenyang: No Zhao Benshan: I have Bi Jian: brother, the next hotel, materials are themselves engaged in Zhao Benshan: There is no,几个菜, and two, and give more opportunities for teachers to complete your hotel. Small Shenyang: presented a chant! Oh, so how do you buckle uncle! A not a little, we would also like to give a. Zhao Benshan: I point the abalone, lobster, you do not mind a few do, Small Shenyang: have not, you do not mind a few do, my age a small person's life is very short, sometimes with sleep are the same, and one eye closed, one earned, one day later, one eye closed, not earned, passed in this life Bi Jian: brilliant. Zhao Benshan: incisive what, he is fine fart Small Shenyang: money is身外之物, Human What is most painful, die, the money did not flower. Zhao Benshan: The most painful is the person alive, the money gone. The child ah Small Shenyang: This too has been stingy. Zhao Benshan: do dishes while, duck came from an early age is an art of bacteria Bi Jian: art cells Zhao Benshan: look to see if you can be on the "Avenue of Stars." Bi Jian: brother, I understood, you then I am here, is the granddaughter in order to allow the "Avenue of Stars." Zhao Benshan: waiter, grabbed the microphone karaoke OK. Bi Jian: In accordance with U.S. rules,自报家门 Zhao Benshan: to start from the front, not nervous Maomao: I come from big cities are Tieling Lotus Dashuigou Chek son, my name is duck feelings today are the impulse sunny Tonight, Tonight, cloudy to sunny. Small Shenyang: ah al weather forecast Zhao Benshan: mood! Are feeling. Maomao: mood from cloudy to sunny, why ah, I find my lords, I very good master to take me on溜光Avenue. Bi Jian: "Avenue of Stars" Mao: I am very grateful to my lord for giving me this opportunity to thank you too, and really be able to bring me to the road, I thank you for eight generation ancestors, my ancestors on behalf of eight people, thank you, will not let you play a trick on . Zhao Benshan: the child is the revenge you want to, ah, do not pay a debt of gratitude, Gratitude, out can not forget you, Li Gu Yi singing the "Qinghai-Tibet Plateau." Maomao: Li Na that are, and live performance, "the Qinghai-Tibet Plateau" Zhao Benshan: Central do not have to sing, and sing behind. Bi Jian: age is not, really high voice Zhao Benshan: again a Maomao: Grandfather, today, eat a little salty Zhao Benshan: behind连哭带sing Bi Jian: Wait, Say连哭带line will not do, talk about the award-winning speech, "Avenue of Stars" is the true story has yet to Beijing, on the award-winning speech. Zhao Benshan: lords him here, I have not psychological bottom right, I said the number of three, she would cry, really, with the lords have feelings, old photos here. Maomao: (expression of cry ... laugh ...) Zhao Benshan: finished, what laughter. Maomao: too interesting Bi sword: not said, talent is true that singing is not bad. Small Shenyang: This is a good, ah, this will last, I can last. Zhao Benshan: You section begins and ends, the Small Shenyang: The "Avenue of Stars" Zhao Benshan: You上炕Yes, it is a matter for the arts circle Small Shenyang: You let me sing one Zhao Benshan: will not let you sing Small Shenyang: will not let me sing, I will be out of your business account Zhao Benshan: You say, must be better than to sing good Bi Jian: You started to speak, or自报家门 Small Shenyang: I am in fact, and his fate is the same, there is also a surname of the master Bi Bi Jian: What you will Small Shenyang: I will be a parody Bi Jian: Who imitate Small Shenyang: Liu Huan Teacher Bi Jian: imitate that period? Small Shenyang: "I and you" Zhao Benshan: No, he should not and your singing! Bi Jian: It is not me and him. Zhao Benshan: Well, I better not. Bi Jian: This is the name of a song called me and you, sing! Small Shenyang: you and I, heart to heart ... ... Small Shenyang: Oh妈呀, singing into a myth! Zhao Benshan: leave it, sing migraine, and serve it Small Shenyang: I have a quartet, and I sing a bar of刀郎 Zhao Benshan: Do you sing it屎壳郎 Small Shenyang: Yes刀郎singer's name, the names of singers are刀郎 Bi Jian: You come back a Small Shenyang: I will sing the "Avenue of Stars," Aaron's song. Bi Jian: What's your name Small Shenyang: My Chinese name is called small Shenyang Bi Jian: There are still a foreign name Small Shenyang: Small ~ ~ Yang Shen Bi Jian: What? Zhao Benshan: hear no English name叫小~ ~ hurt ~ ~ like Bi Jian: Where are you from the person, Small Shenyang: I莲花村are the Bi Jian: You are the莲花村? Bi sword: your son, let me find a small Shenyang, That's him, tomorrow I'll go to Beijing on the "Avenue of Stars" Zhao Benshan: vegetable stew gave you, and you do not give me her face to the old face, we should not allow him to meet with you master, you seen上网news, click-through rate very high, above the duck said that she . Bi Jian: duck is him! Bi Jian: serve immediately, today's meal, I package, and I'll treat you, duck, and tomorrow you follow the big brother on the "Avenue of Stars", you engage in a combination is called not bad money. Maomao: I can go yet Bi Jian: Yes. Maomao: Thank you, master. Small Shenyang: Thank you. Zhao Benshan: "Avenue of Stars" are the people arena, they have had, and I would also like you. Bi Jian: Online also has your name. Zhao Benshan: Your little bit of give it a try. Zhao Benshan: Actually, I still have not told you a secret! Bi Jian: What secret? Zhao Benshan: Actually, I also named Bi lords.

A: oh, it's you, B, what's going on these days? B: well, not bad. It's a beautiful day, isn't it? A: Yes, it is. That's why I am here to enjoy the work by the famous artist. B: So am I. Do you find anything really worth for appreciation? A: Well, I just found a painting. it's really interesting but I can’t recognize who drew it. It is brushed simply but I think it expresses something. B: Really? Please show me, I think I can tell you whose work it is. A: This way please The two men stopped in front of a painting. A: Look, this is what I told you. B: Hmmm, it is a house; the light is on and no dark inside. there is a flower in the vase which is in different colors. The flower is on the desk near the window. Look, the sun is in the sky with some sunshine around it. It is an abstract work, even without frame. but I believe it is meaningful. A: yeah, I agree with you. I guess it is drawn by a famous artiest like Picasso, he likes to draw something simple but meaningful. B: It is a precious painting. I believe it. C came at that moment. C: excuse me, I am the manager here and I need to take the painting down now. A: Wait a minute, please tell us who drew it. We all believe it is from a famous artist but we just cant know the name. B: yes, please tell us. C: A famous artist?? Are you kidding me? This is drawn by my grandson; he is very naughty and hung his art class homework on this wall! A&B: What!?这是我根据以前的高中课本里的一篇文章改编的。我们学校的教师在教师基本功大比武时，自编自演的，当时很成功的。不过，原来的脚本已经找不到了，我通过自己的回忆大体把它呈现出来了，这个短剧场景可以自己按情况更改，人可多可少，最好幽默一点的同学表演。 Napolan and his soldiers（拿破仑这个单词我记不清楚了） 众士兵排列整齐的上。 M: Attention.（立正） Turn right/left. Quick time, march!（齐步走） (吹哨) Halt!(立定) Turn right/left. At ease!(稍息).Dismiss!(解散) （在宿舍里） Ss: Cheer!(干杯) （班长带着一新士兵推门进来） M: Hello!Everyone! This is Sam. He is Swede. Today he join us. Let's give him a warm welcome! Ss: Welcome! Welcome! (握手、拍肩 和他打招呼，但是他摇摇头) M: He doesn't know French at all. Ss: What a pity! 有一天，一个士兵慌慌张张的跑了过来。 A. Monitor! Monitor! M: What's the matter with you? A: I hear Napolan will be here in a month. M: What shall we do? B. I hear N often asks three quenstions. and often in an order. The first one is "How old are you?". The second one is "How long have you been in the Amry?". The third one is "Did you join any of my two compaigns?" M: All of us have no problem except Sam. He doesn't know French. What shall we do? B. I have an idea. From now on all of us teach him the three questions at any time. Ss: Good! 各种场合： 睡觉: A: Sam. How old are you? Sam:21.sir! A: How long have you been in the Army? Sam: 3 years sir! A: Did you join any of my two compaigns? Sam: Both.sir! 吃饭:B:Sam. How old are you? Sam:21.sir! B: How long have you been in the Army? Sam: 3 years sir! B: Did you join any of my two compaigns? Sam: Both.sir! 跑步：C:Sam. How old are you? Sam:21.sir! C: How long have you been in the Army? Sam: 3 years sir! C: Did you join any of my two compaigns? Sam: Both.sir! ..... Ss: We believe that's no problem at all. A:(慌慌张张的) N is coming. N is coming. (众士兵立正) N: Hello! Everyone. How are you? Ss: Fine. Thank you!sir! Sam 在哆嗦，引起了拿破仑的注意。 N: （走到他的面前）Well. How long have you been in the Army? Sam: 21 . sir. N: (非常吃惊的) How old are you? Sam: (非常自信的) 3 .sir. N: (生气的) Either you or I am mad!!!! Sam:(洋洋得意的)Both. sir!!! Ss: My god!!! 众士兵失望的下场了。 The hare and the tortoise One morning, a hare and a tortois meet in a forest,so they begin to talk. H: Good morning. Mr Tortoise. T: Oh, it's you. Mr Hare. Good morning! H: What are you doing? T: I'm running. H:Running? Ha ha ha! Can you run? Your legs are too short! T: Of course I can. H:My legs are long. I can run faster than you. T: Don't be so sure. H:Well then. Let's run to the tall tree over there. Let's see who can get there first. T: All right. Ready? Go! A. Mr Tortoise goes very slowly. But Mr Hare runs very fast. Soon he comes to a small tree. H: Where is Mr Tortoise? Aha! There he is!He is far behind me. How slow he is! Mmm. it's so hot! Here is a tree. I'll have a short sleep first. T: Oh, he is sleeping under the tree there. But I can't stop. I must go on. H: Ah! What a nice sleep! Let me go on. Oh, where 's Mr Tortoise? Where is he now? I must hurry. A: Soon he runs to the tall tree. Mr Tortoise is sitting under the tree and waiting for him. T:Hi, Mr Hare! How are you? I'm here first. Who is faster, Mr Hare ,you or me? H: Oh!..... A: After a long time. Mr Hare and Mr Tortoise meet again. What will they do? Please look carefully. H: Hello!Mr Tortoise. Let's have a match again, OK? T: Oh. all right. H: Let's see who is faster this time. T: OK! One, two . Go! H: This time I can't sleep ,I must be the first. T: This time I must be the winner. Mr Hare isn't faster than me. No matter! A: This time Mr Hare runs very fast. But Mr Tortoise is very slow. H: Hooray! I am the winner! T: I can't believe that! (crying) A few months later. In the forest animals are all together. They are talking about the match of Mr Hare and Mr Tortoise. M:The first time ,Mr Tortoise is the winner. D: The second time , Mr Hare is the winner. M: But We don't know who is really the winner. So they must have another match. P: I agree with you. A: All the animals want them to have another match.So a new match begins between them. H: I try my best to be the winner. T: I must be careful. I can't be far behind him. M: Ready ? Go!!! H: I am faster than him. (worried) How can I cross the river? Mr Tortoise is near me. How can I do? How can I do? T: What's the matter? Mr Hare? Oh ! You can't cross the river. No matter , you can cross the river on my back. Come here! Let's go across the river together. H: (exciting) Thank you very much! Thank you!!! T: (smiling) Not at all! We must help each other. A: They go across the river safely. They go on running. T: Oh ! my leg. Something is wrong with my leg. What can I do? H: Where is Mr Tortoise? There must be something wrong with him. Let me have a look. What's wrong with you? T: Something is wrong with my leg. I can't run any longer. H: Don't worry. You can get the forest on my back. T: No. You just go on running. Don't worry about me. H: Let's help each other. (They go on running together slowly) M: Look! everyone! How strange they are! A: When they know the matter.they all say: The winners are Mr Tortoise and Mr Hare!! They sing a happy song! So much for the play!

英语剧本-《不差钱》英文版Got the Money Anyway(A Comic Piece for the CCTV Spring Festival Gala 2009)Play script by Cui Kai et al.（舞台上是一个餐厅的背景，写着：“苏格兰情调”。本山大叔穿着中山装，身上背着一串蒜头，手上拿着野鸡，拉着毛毛上场。）(This short play is set in a restaurant named "Scottish Taste / Feel." Uncle Zhao, in his customary Chinese tunic suit, enters, carrying a string of garlic on his back and a pheasant in hand, with his granddaughter Yadar in tow.)赵本山：到了。毛毛： 到了。赵本山：这就是铁岭最贵的一家饭店。这不，苏格兰调情（tiáo qíng）。毛毛： 爷爷，你念反了，苏格兰情调（qíng diào）。赵本山：啊，情调？就搁这儿吃。毛毛： 爷爷，这家老贵的啦。赵本山：贵？咱带钱了，带三万多块，那包呢？毛毛： 我没拿包啊。赵本山：装钱那包，黄包。毛毛： 完了，让我落炕上了。赵本山：我说，你这孩子还能办点事吗？！这给你办事，落炕上了还。兜里还有钱吗？毛毛： 兜里，多少钱哪才？才70多块钱。赵本山：我还有400。行，够了。毛毛： 这也不能够啊。赵本山：哎呀，够不够就这样了。服务员！Uncle Zhao Here we are.Yadar Here we are.Uncle Zhao It's the most pricy eatin' spot in Tieling: "Scottish Tease / Fool."Yadar You got it wrong - Scottish taste / feel, not tease / fool.Uncle Zhao All right, taste / feel. We're gonna have our meal here anyway.Yadar But it's very expensive.Uncle Zhao So whut? We've got the money, 30,000 yuan. Where's the bag?Yadar What bag?Uncle Zhao The yellow one with the money in it.Yadar Oh no, I left it on the brick bed.Uncle Zhao So whut can you do at all? I'm goin' t'rough all this for you and you had the nerve to forget the bag on the bed! Any money left on you?Yadar Let me see... (Fumbling) only 70-plus yuan.Uncle Zhao Here's 400 more.Yadar Still not enough.Uncle Zhao No matter. Waiter!（小沈阳上）小沈阳：对不起大爷，我们这是高档酒店，不收农副产品。赵本山：不是，我们是吃饭的。小沈阳：妈呀，吃饭的？赵本山：不像啊？小沈阳：不太像。赵本山：我说姑娘啊，这顿饭非常重要。小沈阳：妈呀，你管谁叫姑娘呢，人家是纯爷们。赵本山：咋这么个打扮，还穿个裙子呢。小沈阳：这是按我们苏格兰风格来包装的。再说也不是裙子啊，这不七分裤吗。你看，是有腿的哦。妈呀，着急穿跑偏了。妈呀，我说走道咋没有裆呢。赵本山：行了，那条腿留明儿个穿，哈哈哈。小伙子我跟你说呀，今天我要请一位重要客人吃饭，你一定要招待好。小沈阳：呃，没问题。赵本山：来来来，我问问你，你们这个酒店，如果要急头白脸吃一顿，得多少钱？小沈阳：咋还吃急眼了呢？赵本山：我意思就是，最贵的都点上。小沈阳：得一、两万的。赵本山：一、两万？啊，那啥，有没有这种情况，今儿个吃完了，明儿个来结账？ (Shenyang, the waiter, enters.)Shenyang Sorry, sir. We're of high class here. We don't take on stuff from street peddlers.Uncle Zhao We're your customers. Don't we look like it?Shenyang Not quite.Uncle Zhao We're gonna have an important meal here, miss.Shenyang Don't you call me a miss. I'm a man - from the inside out.Uncle Zhao Then how c'me you wearin' a skirt?Shenyang Why, it's men's wear in Scottish style. See, it's no skirt but Capri pants. Look at this, look. Oh, damn it, I didn't get into one of the trousers in a hurry. No wonder I feel different while walking.Uncle Zhao Leave that trouser for tomorrow, hah! I tell you, boy, we're gonna have a damn' important guest here in a minute. You should do you' best.Shenyang No problem.Uncle Zhao How much does a meal cost here if we get at it like mad?Shenyang Why so / What's wrong?Uncle Zhao I mean if we order nothin' but the best.Shenyang About 10,000 to 20,000.Uncle Zhao Whut if s'mebody eats today and pays tomorrow?小沈阳：打白条儿啊？赵本山：不是啊，不是打白条，不差钱，有钱。喏。小沈阳：啥意思？赵本山：小费。小沈阳：妈呀，大爷你真敞亮，你太帅了。赵本山：给一百块钱还帅呢。我跟你说这不白给啊。一会儿客人到了，你一定要给足我面子，明白吗？我到点菜的时候，你得替我兜着点。小沈阳：咋兜呢？赵本山：既把面子给了，但是呢又不能花得......太狠。我要点贵菜......小沈阳：我就说没有呗。赵本山：哎呀妈呀，你太厉害了。来来来，拿点。再给你30，来。小沈阳：我跟你都明码的哦。赵本山：谢谢。小沈阳：放心吧。毛毛： 爷爷，我有点饿了。赵本山：饿了？来碗面条。小沈阳：呃，78一碗。赵本山：啥面？这么贵。小沈阳：苏格兰打卤面。赵本山：是不是卤子贵？小沈阳：卤不要钱。赵本山：那就来碗卤子，先尝尝咸淡。快去，快去。小沈阳：妈呀，没这么上过呀。赵本山：那是我没来，我要来，你早就这么上了。去吧去吧。小沈阳：这老爷子，我要说面条不要钱，要面条了你还。Shenyang You'll give me an IOU?Uncle Zhao Not that. I've got the money anyway. Take this.Shenyang What's it?Uncle Zhao A tip for you.Shenyang You do understand people / things / the world, sir - you look cool!Uncle Zhao Whut's a hundred yuan to me! Still, you ain't get it for nothin'. When my guest c'mes, you put on a show with me. If I order expensive food, you should stop me doin' so.Shenyang Like how?Uncle Zhao Showin' due respect for my guest, yes. Spendin' too much on a meal, no. Whut if I ask for somethin' dear?Shenyang I'll say "sorry, this we don't have."Uncle Zhao You're smart. C'me, here's another 30 yuan.Shenyang I'm not gonna cheat you when it comes to prices.Uncle Zhao Thank you, boy.Shenyang Nothing much.Yadar Grandpa, I'm hungry.Uncle Zhao How much's a bowl of noodles?Shenyang 78 yuan.Uncle Zhao Whut noodles can be so expensive?Shenyang Scottish sauced noodles.Uncle Zhao Does the sauce cost much, too?Shenyang It's free.Uncle Zhao Get us a bowl of sauce, so we can see whether the taste's right. Quick.Shenyang That's no way to serve a meal, sir.Uncle Zhao You think so only becuse I didn't show up here before. Now it's time to make s'me change.Shenyang (to himself) Had I said the noodles are free, he would've asked for noodles. (Exits)