蜡笔1982
A Soldier's Brilliant IdeaMr. Robinson had to travel somewhere on business, and as he was in a hurry, he decided to go by air. He liked sitting beside a window when he was flying, so when he got on to the plane, he looked for a window seat. He found all of them had already had been taken except for one. There was a soldier sitting in the seat beside this one, and Mr. Robinson was surprised that he had not taken the one by the window; but, anyhow, he at once went towards it.When he reached it, however, he saw that there was a notice on it. It was written in ink and said, "This seat is preserved for proper load balance, thank you." Mr Robinson had never seen such an unusual notice in a plane before, but he thought that the plane must be carrying something particularly heavy in it, so he walked on and found another empty seat, not beside a window, to sit in.Two or three people tried to sit in the window seat beside the soldier, but they too read the notice and went on, when the plane was nearly full, a very beautiful girl hurried into the plane. The soldier, who was watching the passengers coming in, quickly took the notice off the seat beside himself and in this way succeededin having the company of the girl during the whole trip.英语幽默：士兵坐飞机有美女陪伴的高招由于生意方面的事，罗宾逊先生得出趟门。因为有点紧急，他决定坐飞机。乘机旅行时，他喜欢靠窗坐，故而一登机，他就寻找一个靠窗的座位。他发现只有一个靠窗的座位还空着。在那空座位边坐着一名士兵。令罗宾逊先生纳闷的是，这位士兵没有坐靠窗的位置。罗宾逊先生不管那些，他马上径直朝那个空座位走去。然而，等到了那儿，他看见座位上有则启事，是用钢笔写的：“为保持装载平衡，特预设该位置，谢谢合作。”罗宾逊先生还从来没有在飞机上见过如此不同寻常的启事。不过，他想飞机上一定装了什么特别重的物品，于是他找了个不靠窗的位置。又有两三个乘客试图坐在那个士兵旁的靠窗座位上，他们看到那则启事就走开了。当快满座时，一位非常美丽的姑娘匆匆走进机舱。一直在注意进舱旅客的那个士兵赶紧拿掉他旁边空座位上的启事。士兵用这种办法，成功地找到了一位姑娘一路作伴。2、1、 I have said it a hundred times, we need team work，always seek the best in others. The purpose of this trip , is to train our team in a real situation and to test our new members . Those deserving special praise are the little leaf and four eyes. Although new to the trade, they try hard, they have not only surpass themselves, but even the old guard here。“说了多少回了,要团结，眼睛要看这别人的长处。这次出来，一是通过实战锻炼队伍,二是考察新人,在这里我特别要表扬的是小叶和四眼。两位虽然刚刚入道，做人啊， 不但突破了自己， 也超越了在座的前辈。2、This century most expensive commodity is talent.“21世纪什么最贵？人才！！！3、An organization without discipline.“有组织，无纪律。”4、First my gaze toward the moon, but the moon shines on the ditch.“我本一心向明月，奈何明月照沟渠”Who knows me understand my needs, I’m a mystery to he who know me not .“真是知我者谓我心忧，不知我者谓我何求啊”5、I can’t stand you armed robber types, no technical skills what so ever.“我最讨厌你们这些劫匪了，一点技术含量都没有。”6、I can reliably inform you that, uncle lee is very angry. The consequences will be severe。“我可以很负责地告诉你，黎叔很生气，后果很严重。。。”7、I was reckless, I was reckless,never thought that girl would play me。“大意呀，大意呀，想不到被一丫头片子玩儿了。”Father's ThingsWhen Tom Howard was seventeen years old he was as tall as his father, so he began to borrow Mr. Howard's clothes when he wanted to go out with his friends in the evening.Mr. Howard did not like this, and he always got very angry when he found his son wearing any of his things.One evening when Tom came downstairs to go out, his father stopped him in the hall. He looked at Tom's clothes very carefully.Then he said angrily, "Isn't that one of my ties, Tom?""Yes, Father, it is," answered Tom."And that shirt's mine too.""Yes, that's yours too," answered Tom."And you're wearing my belt!" said Mr. Howard."Yes, I am, Father," answered Tom. "You don't want your trousers to fall down, do you?"父亲的东西汤姆.霍德华十七岁的时候，长得和父亲一样高了，于是当他晚上和朋友一起出去时，就开始借父亲的衣服穿。霍德华先生可不喜欢这样，当他发现他的儿子穿他的衣服时，总是非常生气。一天晚上，汤姆下楼准备出去，父亲在门厅里拦住了他。他细细打量着汤姆的穿着。然后他气呼呼地说：“汤姆，那不是我的一条领带吗？”汤姆回答说：“是的，父亲，是你的领带。”“还有那衬衫也是我的。”“是的，衬衫也是你的。”汤姆回答说。“还有呢，你连皮带也用我的。”霍德华先生说。“是的，父亲，”汤姆回答说，“你不愿意让你的裤子掉下来吧？”
天津小吃好
An English play---- Pig Guy has been defeated by Monkey King 悟空：师傅，是不是太累了？休息一下再走吧。 Master, are you tired? Let’s have a rest. 唐僧：没关系，前面不远就有人家了，到了那里再休息吧。 I am fine. Let’s have a rest later. Look! There is a house over there. 悟空仔细地搀扶唐僧继续行走，同时另一边老头、老妈、小媳妇出场。 小媳妇（做哭状）：爹、妈，我…… Daddy, mommy, I, I … 老头：女儿，快走吧，不然那猪精来了，就走不了了。 Honey, hurry up. The spirit is coming soon. 小媳妇走几步又回头跑回老妈的怀里，抱头痛哭。老头在一边叹息，擦泪。 唐僧、悟空走到他们面前。 悟空：师傅，到了。 Master, here we are. 唐僧（走到老头面前行礼，悟空看见了正在哭的母女俩，觉得奇怪，上下打量）：老施主，我是从 东土大唐前往西天取经的和尚，想借贵地休息一晚，不知方便否？ Excuse me, sir. I am the monk from the east. Can we stay over here tonight? 老头（做哽咽状）：哦，是东土大唐来的高僧啊，可以可以。（别过脸去继续哭泣） Oh, you are the monk from the east. Sure. Sure, come in, please …… 唐僧正在奇怪，老妈闻声抬起头，仔细打量唐僧，突然扑到唐僧面前。 老妈：高僧啊，你可要救救我的女儿，救救我们一家啊。 Master, please save my daughter, save my family… 唐僧：老施主休要伤心，有什么事慢慢说。 Don’t be sad, madam. Take it easy. What happened? 老头：高僧有所不知，我们这里有一只猪精，今天要来跟我女儿成亲，大家都斗不过它，现在正 准备把女儿送出去逃避 Master, there is a spirit here. He wants to marry my daughter, tonight. We are all afraid of him. 唐僧：施主莫怕，我这徒弟本领高强，也许他能帮上你们。 Calm down, sir. My apprentice has great capability. Maybe, he can help you. 老头：唉，高僧啊，以前也来过自称本领高强的师傅，结果都被这猪精打跑了。今天你们就躲着 别出来了吧。 Alas! , master, there have been many people who boast to be very capable. But every time, they were defeated by the spirit. You’d better keep away tonight. 悟空：噢，有这么厉害的妖怪？我倒要会他一会。待会你们只管躲起来，外面发生什么事，都不 用管。 What? Is the spirit really so strong? I’d like to see how great he is. All of you just stay inside. Don’t come out no matter what happens. 这时起了风声（音乐），老头一家吓得站起来混身发抖。小媳妇吓得直往老妈怀里钻。悟空镇定 地举手示意，让师傅及老头一家人躲到房间里面去。自己也手搭凉篷看了看，便不慌不忙地也躲 在了门后，露出一段红袖子。 猪八戒大笑着耀武扬威地走上场来，嘴里大喊：小娘子，我来了。 Darling, here I am. 站在台上停一下，见没有动静，觉得奇怪，往房屋里看去，见露出一段红袖子，高兴地一拍手掌。 八戒：小娘子还害羞呢，不敢出来见老猪吗？来，来，来，我们就要是夫妻了，还害什么羞呀！。 Darling, don’t be so shy! Please come to me. Come on, we will be a couple. 猪八戒跑上去轻轻拉住红袖子，把小娘子拖了出来，小娘子作出害羞的样子，有时又做出猴子的 模样。 八戒：小娘子，不用怕，我虽然长得丑，但本领高强，一定会让你过上好日子的。 Darling, don’t be afraid. Although I am ugly, I am so powerful. I am sure that I can make you happy. 小娘子笑着点头，抓耳挠腮。 八戒：小娘子，你高兴的时候干嘛要像猴子一样？ Darling, why do you look like a monkey ? 小娘子：我一高兴就觉得痒，所以就抓一抓。 When I am happy, I always tickle. 八戒：高兴就好，高兴就好。我们快入洞房吧。 Fine, let’s go to the bedroom. 八戒拉住小娘子就往房子里面钻。小娘子作出动脑筋的样子，又把八戒拉回来。 八戒：哇，小娘子，你好大的力气啊，干嘛把我拉出来啊？ Darling. Why are you so powerful? 小娘子：夫君，你这模样进去会吓着我的父母的，还是去你家里吧。 Honey, your appearance will frighten my parents. We’d better go to your home. 八戒：去我家？那太好了，我们这就走吧。 Go to my house？OK. that’s a great idea. Let’s go. 两人走了几步，小女子做出腿疼摔了一下的样子，八戒忙扶起她，作出痛惜的样子。 小女子：我一个弱女子，哪里能走这么远？夫君背我吧。 I cannot walk any further. Can you carry me on your back? 八戒：背你？好，好，好。谁让你是我的媳妇呢？ Carry you on my back? All right. You're my wife after all. Come on. 八戒把小女子背上：娘子，我们这就出发了。 Darling, Let's go. 小女子（在八戒头上一点）：走吧，呆子。 Okay. Let’s go. 音乐响起(直到八戒摔倒)。八戒在台上走一圈，做出越走越慢，越走越累的样子。小女子在他背 上抓耳挠腮，非常高兴。 八戒：小娘子，你怎么这么重啊？ Darling, why are you so heavy? 小女子：不是我重，只怕是你不想背我吧？ Do you think so? Don't you want to carry me?) 八戒：不,不,不，我背，我背。 Yes, I do. I do. 继续艰难地走。小女子得意地在背上笑。八戒体力不支，一跤摔倒，小女子倒地之后， 灵活地越上台上的假山，先做出猴子笑看八戒的样子，再做出摔疼了的样子在那里呻吟。 八戒听到女子的呻吟，忙东张西望找小媳妇。 八戒：娘子，摔着了没有？娘子，摔着了没有？娘子，你摔到哪去了？怎么看不见你了？ Darling, are you OK? Darling, where are you? Why can't I see you? 小女子（偷偷地笑，再装作痛苦的样子）：夫君，我在这里呢。 Honey, I am here. 八戒：哇，娘子, 你怎么摔到高的地方去了？ Darling. Why did you go up there? 小女子：还不是你这呆子害的。 That's your fault. 八戒：对不起，娘子。对不起，娘子。 Sorry, darling. I’m very sorry. 小女子：看你这么辛苦，我也摔疼了，那就休息休息吧。 You look so tired, and I feel sore. Let’s have a rest. 八戒：太好了。 我们就休息一下吧！ Have a rest? That’s a good idea. Let’s have a rest. 八戒听了高兴地坐在下面休息，小女子仔细地打量他。 小女子（撒娇地）：夫君，你是哪里的神仙，我都还不知道，怎么能嫁给你呢？你可要告诉我。 Honey, how can I marry you? I don’t even know where you come from. You must tell me the truth first. 八戒：唉，别提了，想当年我本是天上的天篷元帅，上天入地，八面威风。只因冒犯了嫦娥， 被玉帝贬下凡尘，错投了猪胎，长成这般模样。 Alas! Don’t mention it. I was Tianpeng marshal, I could fly between heaven and the world. Only because I made a big mistake, I was punished by Yudi. So I became a pig. That’s why I am so ugly. 小女子：亏你长得这么丑，还敢出来见人。 You look too ugly to meet people. 八戒：本来我也不想出来，只是南海观音点化我，叫我在这里等候前往西天的取经人。等了这么久， 也不见，便出来逛逛，能碰到娘子你，是我一生的造化，还管它什么西天取经呢？（八戒高兴地过 去想拉小女子的手） I didn’t want to come here. Nanhai Guanyin asked me to wait for Tangseng. I've been waiting for a long time, but nobody has come. It’s lucky to meet you here. 小女子（把手甩开）：你说自己是天上的神仙，怎么连我都背不动，真让人难以相信。 You said that you were an immortal in the heaven . Why can’t you carry me? It’s impossible! 八戒：我真的是天上的神仙，你干嘛不信呢你。 I am really the immortal. Why don’t you believe me? 小女子：那你拿出点本事来瞧瞧。 Show me some gongfu then. 八戒：好，让我露两手来给你看看。 OK, let me show you my gongfu. 从石头后拿出钉钯，舞了起来。小女子暗暗点头。当八戒的钉色舞到小女子面前时，被小女子一把 抓住，往石山后面一拖，八戒被拖了过去。 八戒：娘子，你怎么这么大的力气？ Darling. Why are you so strong? 小女子：有本事你把我拖出去呀。 Pull me out if you can . 八戒做出用力拖的样子，没有发现拖出来的却是悟空。悟空一松手，八戒摔倒在地。 八戒：娘子，你怎么这么狠心把我摔倒了? 不要开玩笑了。 How could you let me fall down? Don’t kid any longer. 悟空大笑：呆子，看看我是谁！ You Silly! Look at me. Who am I? 八戒一看，吓得跳起来：齐天大圣，我的妈呀。 My god! You are Mahatma! 八戒转身想跑，被悟空拦住，两人打了起来，八戒不是对手，被悟空压住，不能动弹。 悟空：呆子，你可还敢在这里害人不成？ You silly! Dare you harm others any more? 八戒：不敢了，不敢了。 No, I dare not! 悟空： 你可还敢在这里娶媳妇？ Dare you wive yet? 八戒：不敢了。大圣爷爷饶我。 No,no. Please forgive me, Mahatma. 悟空：量你也不敢。 I bet you dare not. 悟空放开，八戒转身想跑，被悟空一把抓住耳朵，疼得直叫。 悟空：呆子，想往哪里去？ You silly, where are you going? 八戒：我已答应你，不再闹事了，干嘛还不放我走？ I'll never make trouble any more. Why don't you let me go? 悟空：呆子，我带你去见取经人。 You silly, I'm taking you to meet the sutra-seeker. 八戒：什么？取经人来了？ What? Has Tangseng come? 悟空：走吧。 Yes. Let's go! 两人在台上走半圈，来到房前。 悟空：师傅，出来吧，这妖怪已经被我降服了。 Master, please come out! The spirit has been defeated ! 唐僧等人走了出来，老头一家还有些战战兢兢。 悟空：呆子，还不跪下，见过师傅。 You silly, kneel down to meet your master. 八戒忙对着唐僧下跪，口喊师傅。唐僧非常吃惊。 Master, nice to meet you here. 唐僧：徒儿，这是怎么回事？ My prentice, what's up? 悟空：师傅，这是观世音菩萨特意让他在此等候陪您上西天取经的。 Master, he will accompany you to the west at Guanyin's behest. 唐僧：哦，多谢观世音菩萨，既然这样我就收你为徒，赐你法名为 八戒。 I see! Thank Guanyin! Since then, I will take you as my prentice and name you Bajie. 八戒：谢谢师傅（站了起来）。 Thank you, my master! 老头：恭喜高僧又收神徒。 Congratulations! 唐僧：徒儿们，我们上路吧。（八戒还依依不舍地看着小女子） Let's go ahead, my prentices. 悟空：八戒，还看什么呢？走了。 Bajie, there is nothing to attach to. Let's go! 八戒恋恋不舍地走到前面带路。采纳哦
有毒的少女
The Gifts （礼物）－英语剧本 Mon.： Tomorrow will be Christmas. But Della feels very sad. Because she has no money to buy a present for her husband , Jim . She has only one dollar and eighty-seven cents . They have only 20 dollars a week, it doesn’t leave much for saving. In fact, Della and Jim have two possessions in which they both take very great pride. One is Jim’s gold watch, which has been his father’s and his grandfather’s. The other is Della’s long beautiful hair. D: Life is so hard for me. Though I saved the money for many months , I still have only one dollar and eighty seven cents. D: I-- I--- I have to have my hair cut and sold it . In that way I can get some money and I can buy a beautiful present for Jim. (At the shop—“Madame Sofronie. We Buy Hair Goods of All Kinds”) D: Will you buy my hair? M: Yes, I buy all kinds of hair. Sit down, please. Take your hat off and let me have a look. Oh, very beautiful. Very good! Twenty dollars , OK? D: All right. But please give it to me quickly. M: Here you are. Twenty dollars. D: Thank you. Bye. M: Bye. Mon.：Della spent two hours in the streets. Then she stopped at a Gold Shop and bought a gold watch chain. Now ,Della is at home. D: Oh, what a beautiful gold watch chain. I think it must match Jim's watch. When he sees it he must be very happy . (Suddenly the door opened and in came Jim . ) J: You--? D: Jim. Don’t look at me that way. I had my hair cut off and sold it because I couldn’t have lived through Christmas without giving you a present. Jim, it will grow quickly. You don’t mind, do you ? I just had to do it. My hair grows very fast, you know. Say “Merry Christmas!” Jim, and let’s be happy. J: You’ve cut off your hair? D: I’ve cut it off and sold it. It’s sold. I tell you -sold and gone, too. It’s Christmas Eve , Jim. Be good to me, for it went for you. J: Well , Della. Don’t make any mistake about me. I don’t think there’s anything about a hair cut that could make me love you any less. I know, it went for me. Look at this package . D: What ? J: Look at it yourself. You 'll see. D:Ah! The combs. They were in the shop windows for many months! J:Yes, the beautiful combs, pure tortoiseshell, with jewelry rims--just the color to wear in your beautiful, hair. D: But , Jim. They are expensive combs. I know, my heart had longed for them without the least hope of possession. Now they are mine. Thank you Jim. J; Now, you will see why I was upset at first. D: Jim, you don’t know what a nice –what a beautiful , nice gift I’ve got for you. Can you guess? J: I'm sorry. I won't guess. D: Look. A gold watch chain. Isn’t it lovely ,Jim? I hunted all over the town to find it. You’ll have to look at the time a hundred times a day now. Give me your watch. I want to see how it looks on it . J: Della, Let’s put our Christmas gifts away and keep them a while. They’re too nice to use just at present. I sold the watch to get the money. And I bought the combs. Now, Let’s have our supper.
优质英语培训问答知识库
